An open letter to the residents of Broken Bow, Nebraska.

Dear Broken Bow, Nebraska...

🏠 

STOP obsessing over my LAWN and START obsessing over my BOOKS! 

📚 

Sincerely,

John L. Harmon  

I survived the Homegrown poetry event in Chadron, Nebraska!

It was fantastic!  It was amazing!  It was, dare I say, magical! 

Those are some of the statements I exclaimed to those who asked how the poetry event went.  It was a breath of fresh air to step into the creative atmosphere of Chadron Open Art.  The proprietors, poets and people I met there were warm and inviting.  Honestly, I felt a bit loud and artless among such thoughtful, artistic souls in such an artistic place. 

Thankfully, the 2 Daniels of Chadron Open Art and the other poets, Jewel Rodgers, Stephanie E. Glass and Robert McEwen accepted me for whichever me was present that evening.  I know I was feeling super excited and enthusiastic for the event, so I can only imagine how tactless and uncool I was being.  Dork be dorking, but that’s ok. 

Robert, John, Stephanie and Jewel!

I was a bundle of nerves as the event kicked off, but watching and listening to Jewel and Stephanie perform their moving, thought-provoking words helped me to relax.  When Jewel introduced me, I was ready, but more about that later.  After my moment, Bob transfixed the audience with his poetry and humor.  I felt a distinct impression the majority of the room knew Bob in one way or another.  I definitely won’t forget him now that I’ve met him.  The incredible evening wrapped up perfectly with a few volunteers from the crowd sharing their poetry.  One piece about loving yourself, by a poet named Bailey (spelling?), was beautiful and relatable. 

As for my moment in the spotlight, I feel I did well.  My sister claimed I did a great job.  A few friends from home and elsewhere expressed similar opinions after watching the YouTube video my sister shot and I uploaded that very night.  I’ll let you judge for yourself… 

I must give a shout-out to Jeanne and The Olde Main Street Inn!  This historic hotel, located in downtown Chadron, Nebraska is like stepping back in time.  Jeanne greeted my sister and I with a refresher drink and we all had a delightful chat for almost an hour.  Our room, The Cowboy Room, was wonderfully unique.  So much more atmosphere than a chain hotel.  The next morning, over our choice of caffeine, we chatted with Jeanne about this, that and everything.  She made us feel at home and we will definitely stay at The Olde Main Street Inn the next time we visit the city of Chadron! 

Another shout-out goes to Chadron Public Library at its temporary location!  My sister and I found its usual home, but it is being remodeled.  Thankfully, the rather groovy temporary location is not too far away from The Olde Main Street Inn and was easy to find.  I donated copies of Vision Bent, Dark Excursions and Sturgeons for possible inclusion into their collection.  It would be awesome to see my books at a second Nebraska library, but we shall see if they are accepted. 

Overall, the weekend of September 5 & 6 was fantastic, amazing and, yes, even magical.  I got up in front of a crowd and performed my poetry and the audience seemed to enjoy and maybe related to my words.  I feel a sense of pride for having done what I could’ve scarcely imagined a few years ago, but the sound of the applause still embarrasses me.  So, even if nothing else comes from this event, at least I can say, “I did it!” 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  On the way home, we swung by Carhenge in Alliance, Nebraska.  Think Stonehenge made out of cars.  It was interesting and thankfully free. 

The Sleepless Night of Imposter Syndrome

Who the hell do I think I am
A writer, so called 
Because I don’t know
What else to be 
An indie author 
Who hasn’t authored 
Something truly new 
In more years 
Than I’d care to count 
A blogger 
Chock full of nonsense 
Obscure film reviews 
Rarely a short story 
Between a smattering of poems   
A poet 
One collection 
Almost a decade old 
Dust covered half-blind words 
Shaken off 
Blown clean 
For fresh ears 
New eyes 
Different minds 
Deciding my fate 
Don’t say they’ll love me 
Stroking my ego 
So it won’t crack 
Splintering 
Shattering 
Into dark reflections 
Of self doubt and hate 
I need to refract 
Redirect 
Swirling thoughts 
Forming them 
Reshaping them 
With a spoonful of delusion 
A survival technique 
So I may step 
Center stage 
Metaphorical spotlight 
Temporarily 
Blinding and enhancing 
My remaining sight 

~~~~~~~~~~~~
2026, John L. Harmon 

______________
Woke up way too early and I couldn’t fall back asleep.  Wild and terrified thoughts running rampant, so I had to rein them in.

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. I’m excited, and obviously, a bit nervous about the upcoming Homegrown Traveling Series poetry event, happening on September 5th in Chadron, Nebraska.  I’ll be reading a few selections from VISION BENT (half-blind poems)…

HOMEGROWN, a creative event at Chadron Open Art in Chadron, Nebraska on September 5, 2026

I'll just be hanging with the current Poet Laureate of Nebraska and other creative minds in September.

No biggie😅 

That’s how I’ve described the upcoming event in Chadron, Nebraska.  I guess I’m bragging, but also downplaying it, like it’s no big deal.  It is a big deal though.  This opportunity feels like my words are  finally gaining a bit of traction since releasing my first ebook in 2013. 

Hopefully I won’t screw it up, but I also hope the attention doesn’t go to my head.  Becoming an insufferable hoity-toity would not be very becoming. 

NOTE TO SELF
I must remember 
The sun shining 
In my direction 
At this moment 
In this place 
During this time 
Is fleeting 
As a smile 
As a breath 
As life 
~~~~~~~~~~~~
2026, John L. Harmon 

Perhaps I’ll see you at Chadron Open Art on Saturday, September 5th in Chadron, Nebraska.  It should be an amazing experience! 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  My readings will primarily be focused on VISION BENT (half-blind poems), which means I’ll be talking about my chunk of vision loss. 

I survived the library author event!

Speaking in front of an audience of more than 3 people wasn’t as difficult as I imagined.  I didn’t wear my Mad Scientist Glasses, which I regret after seeing the photos, so not being able to clearly see the watching faces helped me relax.  Wearing my power colors, orange & purple, gave me some emotional strength.  Mainly though, I took a breath and was just myself.  Perhaps a little too much myself.

Photo courtesy of the broken bow public library

When asked if we write with our audience in mind, I answered, “I totally write for myself and then hope other freaks like me will find and understand my words.”  Then, when asked how we deal with reviews, I admitted I take good reviews with a grain of salt because I wonder if the reviewer actually read my book.  As for negative reviews, I explained how disappointed I was when a reader left a 1-star rating for DARKENING STURGEONS but failed to leave a review explaining what they didn’t like about my ebook.  I mentioned how I wanted to use a bad review as advertisement because I am more likely to read a book that is hated.  I also bragged how two local readers stopped talking to me after reading my books, which meant my words got a reaction and that made me feel proud.  The moral of my lengthy answer was turn negative reviews into positive ones. 

Photo courtesy of the broken bow public library

My answers might be why only 2 new readers dared to approach my table after the panel.  Thankfully, 2 return readers came back for more.  Plus, it was very nice when a couple of my emotional support humans swung by and said hi.

I regret not having someone take a photo of me with my books.

One of the new readers picked up DARK EXCURSIONS for herself, after a return reader recommended it, and VISION BENT for someone else.  The new reader, who shared a first name with my grandmother, explained she was buying VISION BENT for a friend who is dealing with a health scare involving the eyes.  This made the night for me.  I may not have wrote VISION BENT as an inspirational book, but it feels good to imagine my half-blind words helping someone find comfort or strength when dealing with vision loss. 

Another good experience from the event is when I first entered the room.  One of the other authors, whom I had never met, said he had something for me.  This seriously intrigued me and I was not disappointed.  He was asked to pass a flyer along to me from a writer in Chadron, Nebraska.  The flyer is for an upcoming Pride event, which I’m definitely interested in.  As of this writing, I offered a signed set of my queer books for a raffle/auction.  Hopefully, I’ll figure out a way to get more involved.  This is when I wish Nebraska had a regular train or bus system that traveled all over the state. 

In conclusion…
It’s a good thing to put yourself out there, even if the audience is predominately not for you. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  Pride Month is literally around the corner, so pick up my queer books at an Amazon near you! 
🏳️‍🌈
📚 

DARK EXCURSIONS (the audiobook series)

Why haven’t you experienced…

? 

Are you hesitant to get swept up in the romance between the one-armed gardener and the former stable boy? 
🌹 
Are you afraid you’ll see yourself in the manipulative matriarch and feel proud? 
🩸 
Are you worried you’ll get turned on as the Russian tennis instructor smacks his balls around the court? 
🎾
Are you skittish to discover what wretchedly ugly thing is buried beneath the beautiful hollyhock garden? 
🪦 

Cast aside all fears and experience the DARK EXCURSIONS series as  4 audiobooks from Audible! 

👉Click to listen👈

👉Click to listen👈

👉Click to listen👈

👉Click to listen👈

Yes, you can still experience DARK EXCURSIONS as an ebook series or a 4-in-1 paperback at an Amazon near you! 

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VISION BENT (half-blind poems) is also available as an Audible audiobook! 

👉Click to listen👈

~~~~~~~~~~~~

P.S.  “Hhhmmm..." 🤔 
An audiobook outtake from editing DARK EXCURSIONS: first set… 
🤣

Caturday Vibes!

That’ll do, X-Ray.

That’ll do. 

😼

👉 viewAuthor.at/JohnLHarmon👈 

freakboy on film: A NEW HOPE (1977)

Not so long ago, in posts not too far away… 

I blogged about the Sequel Trilogy and the Prequel Trilogy of the STAR WARS franchise.  Now, here we are with the first film in the coveted Original Trilogy. 

I was extremely young when STAR WARS exploded onto the pop culture landscape and going to the theater with my sister Margaret may be one of my earliest memories.  I wish I could say it was a thrilling experience that forever altered my life, but we both fell asleep during it.  I remember the opening scroll and the Imperial Star Destroyer gunning for Princess Leia’s ship.  I also remember C-3PO and R2-D2 escaping in an escape pod.  Then I remember waking up to see the planet Alderaan being obliterated by the Death Star, or it could have been (SPOILER ALERT) the Death Star being obliterated by Luke Skywalker.  I can’t say for certain.  Then I remember the medal ceremony for the heroes and waking up my sister to tell her it was over.  If I’m brutally honest, I caught the important stuff during that first go around.  I would later see it at the local drive-in without falling asleep, but it’s that first viewing, or lack thereof,  that sticks in my memory. 

Ultimately, STAR WARS Episode IV: A NEW HOPE and the other two episodes of the Original Trilogy became a gigantic part of my childhood.  I thrilled as Luke Skywalker is swept away from his desert planet farm boy life and hurled into the middle of a war between the all-powerful Empire and a scrappy, ragtag rebellion.  You know the story.  If you don’t, what rock have you been living under for the last several decades?  

Princess Leia Organa, a badass rebel and fashion icon, trusts the unlikeliest of duos with some super important information that could put an end to the tyrannical reign of the Empire.  Either through the power of the Force or a plot filled with happenstance, droid soulmates C-3PO and R2-D2 become friends with Luke Skywalker, a moisture farm boy from Tatooine.  Thanks to the droids being hunted by the Empire, Luke loses his family and his home.  Instead of crying around about it, Luke takes off on a space adventure with desert hermit/former Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi.  Together they hope to deliver the super important information to the Rebel Alliance.  To accomplish this mission, they need a spaceship, which they find in a droid-phobic dive bar.  Han Solo, a roguish egotist pilot and his walking carpet sidekick Chewbacca offer passage on board the exceptionally cool Millennium Falcon.  Everyone gets more than they bargained for when they have to also rescue Leia, shut off a tractor beam, and deal with Grand Moff Tarkin and his seemingly second in command/walking fashion statement Darth Vader.  Oh, they also need to take care of that pesky Death Star, a planet destroying battle station.  Will our intrepid heroes save the far, far away galaxy?  If you honestly don’t know, then you’ve been skimming this post.😏 

Trying to race through my ramblings.

The last time I watched A NEW HOPE was a long time ago.  I’m talking before my 2016 chunk of vision loss and before THE FORCE AWAKENS hit theaters.  (My 2023 plan to watch all 3 Trilogies in chronological order stopped after the prequels.)  How did A NEW HOPE hold up after all this time?  I still love writer/director George Lucas’ sci-fi epic, but I wonder if the Prequel and Sequel Trilogies have tarnished the hardcore geek fanboy zeal I used to experience with each viewing.  Don’t get me wrong, I still felt a serious foreshadowing thrill when Obi-Wan (SPOILER ALERT) is obviously fudging the truth about Darth Vader betraying and murdering Luke’s father!  I also can’t help but geek out over the totally super-cool awesomeness of the Millennium Falcon and yes. I may still experience a filmgasm the first time it jumps into hyperspace!  Oh, and there is the lightsaber duel between Obi-Wan Kenobi and Darth Vader!  Forget everything that happens after their confrontation, the film was really just building to that singular moment between frenemies!  Last, but far from least, Princess Leia rocks! 

One thing I found myself appreciating more than I ever did before was the acting.  Obviously, Alec Guinness as Obi-Wan Kenobi, Peter Cushing as Grand Moff Tarkin and James Earl Jones as the voice of Darth Vader shine brighter than the twin suns of Tatooine.  However, I was struck by the 1970’s naturalness of Mark Hamil as Luke Skywalker, Carrie Fisher as Princess Leia Organa and Harrison Ford as Han Solo.  The way they deliver their lines make them seem like ordinary people caught up in extraordinary events.  Of course, Anthony Daniels as C-3PO, Kenny Baker as R2-D2 and Peter Mayhew as Chewbacca create lovably memorable characters without being seen, while David Prowse intimidates as the man behind the Darth Vader mask.   

Space fashionistas work the Galactic runway!

All that being said, the Dark Side of the Force compels me to mention a couple of things that bothered me this time around…

1… Is C-3PO lying to Luke when he claims he doesn’t really know who Princess Leia is as R2-D2 projects her holographic message to Obi-Wan or did the escape pod scramble his golden circuits?  Earlier in the film, while Leia’s ship is under attack by the Empire, C-3PO turns to R2 and grimly states, “There’ll be no escape for the princess this time.”  C-3PO obviously knows Leia, so why was he feigning ignorance with Luke? 

2… Is Luke Skywalker being an overly judgy Good Jedi Bitch when, after being laughed at by Han Solo over a lightsaber training failure, he turns to the roguish pilot and inquires, “You don’t believe in the Force, do you?”  It’s like, get off your high self-righteous Bantha, farm boy!  You just learned about the Force, like, 10 minutes ago, so just leave a “The Force Is Inside You” pamphlet and move on! 

In conclusion…
Has time or the inferior entries in the franchise diminished my intense love of this film ?  Perhaps the psychosexual rabbit hole Andy Milligan shoved me down has forever transformed my filmic tastes.  Whatever the case, I may no longer be the full-tilt, frenzied STAR WARS geek I once was, but A NEW HOPE is still a thrilling sci-fi adventure worth going on.  Just put away critical thinking and let the Force guide you through one of the best popcorn-infused blockbusters of its kind! 🍿 If possible, skip the not-so “Special Edition” and seek out the original version.   
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This post is for ADVENTURE-A-THON, hosted by Cinematic Catharsis & Realweegiemidget Reviews!  

~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  My sister Margaret often “played STAR WARS” with me and my action figures.  We rarely followed the plot of A NEW HOPE, and even accidentally predicted a couple of plot twists that would later be revealed in Episodes V and VI.   However, on one occasion, we radically altered the STAR WARS universe when Luke Skywalker literally lost his head during an aggressive lightsaber duel with Darth Vader.  I was very young at the time, but I remember us both laughing at this unexpected event. 

~~~~~~~~~~ 

Click an episode for more…
Episode I 
Episode II 
Episode III 
Episode Vii
Episode VIII 
Episode IX

FLIGHT RISK (a poem)

Here I stand 
In between 
An ending 
A beginning 
If the door closes 
Should I open a window 
Take a leap 
To see if I can soar 
Never mind the height 
Flying at speed  
Ground falling up
A million miles an hour 
Brace for impact 
By letting go 
Of what I cannot see 
What I can’t control 
Only then maybe 
I will find me 
Swirled in a second wind 
Leaving behind 
All that has been 
Embracing all I could be 

~~~~~~~~~~~~
2025, John L. Harmon  

I’ve been writing a little each day this month and FLIGHT RISK is one result of this endeavor. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  My 2019 collection of half-blind poems can be found as an audiobook from Audible… 

DECONSTRUCTING STURGEONS (the stories behind the story of a fictional little town)

July 16, 2023 was an important day in my personal history.  It was officially the last day my sister and I delivered bad news around town.  Unofficially, we ended up doing it another week until the newspaper found a replacement carrier.  It was also the day I clicked “Publish” three times.  Once for the Kindle ebook, a second time for the paperback and a third time for the hardcover of STURGEONS (the complete serials).  To celebrate its anniversary, here is the story behind the two stories comprising this one book… 

It was a dark and stormy evening in June 2013 as I drove home from a friend’s wedding in Omaha, Nebraska.  The sun was setting, and the rain was torrential as I slowly made my way west on interstate 80.  I was pulling into Grand Island, Nebraska when the rain finally subsided, but darkness had enveloped me.  Home was still an hour away and lightning flashed in the direction I was headed, so I made a decision to seek refuge in a big yellow house.

The inhabitants of this most curious dwelling welcomed me, for they were a cousin and a mutual friend.  Conversation and cannibalism ensued as we caught up on life and then watched a particularly heartwarming Asian film titled ZOMBIE ASS.  Sleep was required after such an emotionally compelling experience, so we retired to our separate sleeping arrangements to wait for whatever morning would bring us. 

My cousin and I, two early risers, were sitting at the kitchen table chatting about this, that and whatever, when our mutual friend joined us with his shiny new computer tablet. I had never seen one before, and he was eager to show us how he could take photos and record videos with it.  Plus, he could perform a voice-activated Internet search with just a touch of the screen.  My first ebook had been published earlier that year, so after several other ideas, I asked him to search for DARK EXCURSIONS. 

He tapped the screen and said, “Dark Excursions.”  A few seconds zipped by and the tablet’s feminine computer voice spoke, “Results for Darkening Sturgeons.”  Simultaneous laughter erupted between the three of us and I instantly knew I had to create something from this wayward voice-activated Internet search.  So, that’s exactly what I did. 

DARKENING STURGEONS, a modern take on 1950’s sci-fi/horror films, became my first blog serial.  It ran from June 2013 to January 2014.  My goal had been to release one chapter a week, but sometimes I got so behind on writing and editing that I  had to skip a week here and there.  This was an exhilarating and exhausting creative experience and I was so proud to have finished the story.  I eventually released all 26 chapters of DARKENING STURGEONS as a Kindle ebook in October 2015.  The cover is a seriously filtered and manipulated photo of the neighborhood I was living in at the time. 

I wouldn’t release another ebook until January 2019.  One of the reasons for this was losing a chunk of my vision in December 2016.  Watching as my world appeared to be fading away left me emotionally like a teenager again.  My body was changing, betraying me, and, at any given moment, I was prone to explode into anger, tears or laughter.  Maybe this is part of the reason why my sister didn’t want me to help deliver bad news around town.  I wanted to feel useful, so I argued I could still do it.  She eventually agreed, but she didn’t want me actually delivering the newspapers because of uneven ground and unforeseen obstacles.  I understood and shared this concern.  As a compromise, I rode along and rolled the newspapers, which was actually more helpful than it sounds. 

It was a dark and tranquil early morning in January 2017 as I sat alone in the car.  Plenty of papers were rolled and my sister was delivering the bad news to one of our customers with an endlessly long driveway.  I was existing in a perpetual state of waiting.  Waiting for the appointment with an eye specialist.  Waiting to find out if my vision loss was reversible.  (SPOILER ALERT: it wasn’t.)  Waiting for whatever was to come next.  My thoughts were spiraling around the terrifying possibilities of the unknown and that’s when I felt a large swelling of despair racing towards me like a tidal wave.  I had felt these depths many times as I saw my world disappearing before my eyes, but I didn’t want to feel it again.  Especially since my sister would return to the car soon. 

I knew I wouldn’t be able to completely prevent the wave from crashing upon my being, but I hoped I could lessen the impact.  My mind focused on what I had accomplished up to that point.  I briefly thought of old, unreleased stuff, but I mainly sorted through more recent creative endeavors.  Going back and forth between my books and blog, I celebrated my words, my characters, my stories, in case my medical crisis was to be the end of my own story.  Then I solely focused on DARKENING STURGEONS because deep down it was my favorite published creation.  The goofy/serious plot, the assortment of quirky characters and how it was all so randomly created could always make me smile. 

That’s when I heard a voice in my head.  A voice I didn’t recognize, and he asked a startling question.  What do I remember about the day my hometown was destroyed?  It was as if someone had asked him the question and he was repeating it before answering.  The answer unfolded behind my diminished eyes and I was swept back into the rebuilt town of Sturgeons, which I had always wanted to revisit.  I felt a few tears slide down my cheeks because I suddenly experienced a twinge of hope.  Hope that I would make it through the chaos and find a way to tell this tale, and I did…eventually. 

HAUNTING STURGEONS, the emotional aftermath of a sci-fi/horror cataclysmic event, became my second blog serial, after two false starts.  I wrote a few chapters later in 2017, but it was too big and too overwhelming of a project at the time.  Then I seriously planned a creative revolution in 2018, but ended up writing VISION BENT (half-blind poems) instead, which I released in 2019.  Years later, after that question, What do I remember about the day my hometown was destroyed, kept reverberating through my mind on a loop, I finally made HAUNTING STURGEONS a reality. 

This blog serial ran for 26 chapters, plus a prologue and epilogue, from August 2021 to March 2022.  Much like DS, releasing one chapter a week of HAUNTING STURGEONS, with a much needed winter holiday break, was creatively exhilarating, exhausting and stressful, in a good way.  What amazed me was the finished story adhered almost verbatim to what had originally unfolded behind my eyes all those years ago.  In September 2022, I released the Kindle ebook edition and I’m still pretty proud of it because it was the first ebook I fully wrote and published strictly using my tablet.  My previous ebooks/books had required technological assistance from the library. 

Then, in 2023, after briefly considering and scrapping a third blog serial, I started editing DARKENING STURGEONS and HAUNTING STURGEONS into a 2-in-1 volume.  I went through a few title options, including The Sturgeons Dichotomy,  but I decided simplicity, and acknowledging its origins, was best, so the book became STURGEONS (the complete serials).  The cover is an altered A.I. image originally generated by Dave of My Gay Opinion and his partner to celebrate the release of HS as an ebook.  

There you have it, the stories behind my fictional little town.  Once again, thank you to anyone who has visited STURGEONS in any of its various forms. Plus, thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words. 

I’ll leave you with a few photos of STURGEONS sent to me by my awesome  readers! 📗

Photo courtesy of Fred’s Shed of Sniffable Stuff

Photo courtesy of The Cornwall Museum of Curious Creations 

Photo courtesy of The Florida Library of Forbidden Fiction 

Photo courtesy of The Cali Kindle Pop-Up Exhibit

Freak Out, 

JLH 

P.S. click the pic to discover how I whipped the midnight oil…