freakboy muses music: ABNORMALS ANONYMOUS by Congo Norvell

Every so often I look back at the crazy films and trashy novels I’ve experienced over the last few years and check to see how readily available they are for others to find.  When I recently did a search for the book ABNORMALS ANONYMOUS by Stella Gray, I noticed there were a couple of copies floating around out there.  I also noticed an audio CD with the same provocative title and cover. 

My first thought was, “Is it an audiobook?”  Then I noticed “by Congo Norvell” and knew I was wrong.  So, I investigated and discovered the CD is an album of music released in 1997 through the New York City-based Jetset Records.  Further investigation turned up only a few tracks posted on YouTube.  I listened to “Johnny in the Boudoir” and immediately ordered a copy from eBay.

The music thrusts you into a seedy dive-bar on the outskirts of town, populated by the night people, the kind of folk inhabiting the fringes of so-called acceptable society.  They will lead you through a den of lurid sex and sex-drenched violence, where obsession and lust reign hand-in-hand with loneliness and heartache.  In other words, this is the perfect soundtrack to trashy pulp novels.

The liner notes list a few people as vocals, but this is  Sally Norvell’s show.  Her voice shifts from torch song lounge singer to a sultry, smoky-voiced temptress to an alt-pop diva.  Wherever the music styles take her, Sally is ready to follow.  

My 3 favorite tracks, in no particular order… 

“Candy” 
An experienced woman is looking for young fresh meat to “go under, down in the gutter and taste the seawater.”  I enjoy the uncomfortable desires pulsating underneath, just like the tone of a trashy novel. 

“She’s Like Heroin to Me.” 
There’s a woman at the top of the stairs who gets under your skin and “cannot miss a vein,” no matter your gender.  A slow lusty burn of crippling obsession at its pulpy best!  

“Johnny in the Boudoir” 
The title says it all.  A man named Johnny meets up for an illicit tryst, but his lover has other plans.  “She was only playin' a part. Just a step away from the straightjacket today. Angora sweater, naughty-clean. Felt like killing, felt like sixteen.”  Johnny’s dead and the mention of an Angora sweater must be a knowing wink to Edward D. Wood, Jr.  Was Johnny’s lover a cross-dressing assassin right out of one of Wood’s novels?  It’s up for the listener to decide, but I think so. 

In conclusion… 
Moody, intriguing, and slyly amusing, this album isn’t for everyone, but it is for anyone with an open mind.  I think I would’ve enjoyed the songs if I had experienced them back in 1997, but I probably appreciate them more now.  So, if you like a little tawdry in your tunes, then ABNORMALS ANONYMOUS by Congo Norvell may be the seedy CD for you! 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  click the pic for my thoughts on the novel of the same name… 

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My books have been called tawdry…
📚 

Happy Life Day…or something

🎵 You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Malla
Comet and Cupid and Donner and Itchy
But do you recall
The most famous Wookiee of all?🎵 

Wait, what? 

Lumpy is neither a reindeer nor the most famous Wookiee!  That honor goes to Lumpy’s father Chewbacca.  Oh, you didn’t know Chewie has a son?  He also has a frazzled wife named Malla and a  cantankerous father named Itchy.  They are anxiously waiting for Chewbacca to stop smuggling and generally galavanting around that far, far away galaxy with Han Solo and come home to celebrate Life Day. 

What is Life Day?  It’s a day to celebrate family and friends, and to hope for galactic peace or something.  All you have to do is throw on a robe, grab a glowing sphere and go into the light like Carol Anne in POLTERGEIST.  Then you’ll find yourself in some rocky, desolate area where Princess Leia Organa warbles a classic Life Day ditty, while Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, Chewbacca, C-3PO and R2-D2 look on with varying degrees of interest. 

Before you get to hang with STAR WARS Legacy Characters in Life Day Limbo, you have to pay your dues by spending way too much time with Malla, Itchy and Lumpy.  You will have to sit through a cooking lesson with Malla and a multiple-armed alien Julia Child, played by Harvey Korman.  You’ll have to wonder what the hell is going on when Itchy gets overly excited by a trippy virtual reality song performed by Diahann Carroll.  Then there is Lumpy.  You will be forced to watch Lumpy refuse to do the dishes, take out the trash, try to steal a cookie and generally behave like a bratty prototype of an Ewok.  

Malla wishes she had used Wookiee birth control 

I honestly don’t remember if I watched THE STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL back in the day, but surely I did.  I mean, I may have been a very little kid, but I was a huge fan.  Maybe I blocked out the experience for the sake of my sanity.  So, my first memorable viewing was in the early 2000’s when I picked up a bootleg VHS copy at a comic book store.  This sketchy copy had all the authentic 1970’s commercials and the “Fighting the Frizzies” news promo.  For worse, or maybe better, the bootleg DVD I ordered from eBay appears to be a somewhat spiffed up print, at least compared to the VHS, that is commercial and frizzy free.  It’s almost what it would be like if George Lucas or Disney+ finally released an official version. 

THE STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL needs to be seen to be believed.  It’s a strange mixture of a made-for-TV movie and a variety show.  Who was the target audience in 1978?  I’m sure my 5-year-old  self would’ve been glued to the television set in a frenzied desire to see more of the characters I saw on the big screen.  I doubt I would’ve cared about Chewbacca’s family, Art Carney as a shopkeeper and Bea Arthur as a bartender at the Cantina.  Though, decades later, Bea Arthur singing a farewell song to drunken aliens is a highlight for me.  

Another highlight is the animated STAR WARS adventure Lumpy covertly watches while Imperial Stormtroopers search their tree house home.  The animation has a funky 70’s look and introduces badass bounty hunter Boba Fett a couple of years before THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK.  This alone makes THE STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL worth watching. 

In conclusion…
Ridiculous, weird and sometimes just plain painful, THE STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL is a time capsule of 1970’s television and a testament to the impact A NEW HOPE had on pop culture.  The fact they got the original cast, sans Alec Guinness, is truly remarkable and is another reason to watch.  So, if you’re in the mood for a certain kind of Yuletide sci-fi cheese, or you’re a STAR WARS completist, THE STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL is the festive tradition you didn’t know you needed…and you can find it on YouTube.  It’s honestly better than some of the more recent theatrical films.  

Chewie agrees with my assessment

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  Disney+ released THE LEGO STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL in 2020 and it’s a fun, satirical love letter to the original special and the entire STAR WARS universe.  

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Click an episode for more STAR WARS…
Episode I
Episode II 
Episode III 
Episode IV 
Episode V
Episode VI 
Episode VII
Episode VIII 
Episode IX 

booking freakboy: ABNORMALS ANONYMOUS by Stella Gray

I haven’t been this disappointed in a book since DOROTHY MUST DIE by Danielle Paige.  The terrific “Real Princess of Oz” trailers promised readers a campy-bitchy fun trip down the Yellow Brick Road… 

…but we ended up with a painfully long and tedious prologue disguised as a novel.  I wasn’t even aware DOROTHY MUST DIE was going to be a series when I wasted my time with it, so the non-ending sent me through the emerald roof!  Hey, I know what you’re thinking, but at least I called my debut ebook “DARK EXCURSIONS: first set” so readers would expect and/or dread more installments!  
As for my latest dive into Vintage Gay Pulp Fiction… 

1964, National Library Books 

From the potentially offensive alliterative title and the gender nonconformity of its cover, I thought ABNORMALS ANONYMOUS by Stella Gray was going to be a fun, wildly crazy, non-pc look at LGBTQ+ life in the mid-1960’s.  It sure as hell started out as I imagined and I was loving it!  Two siblings, Kurt and Bill Rockne are causing Clint, their conservative, strait-laced father, grief by their “abnormal” desires.  Kurt is allegedly hetero-centric, but allows his family to believe he’s queer after he was seen in one gay bar.  He perpetuates this supposed ruse by hanging out with drag queens.  The author never really explores the character, but it seems like there is more going on with Kurt.  I mean, would a straight man in 1964 pretend to be attracted to men for no real reason?  I think not!  Bill, a more fully realized character, is all masculine swagger with new wife Prissy, a voluptuous firecracker of a woman.  The thing is, Bill and Prissy had one of those “Gay Village Weddings” because Prissy is bisexual and Bill is biologically a woman.  

I did not see that gender-bending twist coming and then things got wilder and crazier!  Kurt and Prissy have the hots for each other and Bill agrees to let them sleep together if it means Prissy will “cure” Kurt of his homosexual tendencies.  While Kurt and Prissy are getting busy, a drag queen named Leslie arrives and demands to see Kurt.  Bill won’t allow Leslie to interrupt Kurt’s chance at straightness, so the solid sibling physically struggles with the determined drag queen.  With Bill dressed in traditionally male clothing and Leslie all dolled-up  as a feminine woman, the struggle turns to passion. 

Clint couldn’t be happier that his offspring have finally tasted the “normalcy” of hetero love, even if Bill’s experience was still kinda bent.  Their step onto the straight and narrow path inspires the siblings to take their father’s advice and start an “Abnormals Anonymous” meeting.  Bill agrees to head the meeting and the agenda is ostensibly to help the queer community act straight in front of biological family and at their workplaces.  As I said, it’s 1964, so really the ultimate goal is to make heterosexuals out of all of them.  The first meeting is spectacular with various LGBTQ+ representation.  A highlight is when several members brazenly call out the meeting’s bullshit and proudly leave in all of their queer glory! 🏳️‍🌈 

Teaser page at the beginning of the book.

That is pretty much the last enjoyable moment in the book.  It suddenly becomes all about random hetero strangers showing up to the meetings with kinks and fetishes as their “abnormal” issues.  Bill and the gang help a sexually frustrated Peeping Tom, a masochist and a borderline necrophiliac who needs the woman to remain perfectly still during sex.  All of this was sort of interesting but seemed more like a distraction from the real plot and was not what the cover promised! However, if I had read the back of the book, I would’ve realized what I was getting into. 

Anyhoo, after all the kink freaks are dealt with, Bill decides to continue to dress an act in a traditionally male way, but Leslie has forsaken his drag persona and is now a “real man.”  Then, in the most horrifically disturbing part of this book, Bill and Leslie fight it out over who will be dominant.  To add to this already triggering scene, Clint, Kurt and Prissy are cheering on Leslie to beat Bill into womanly submission and he does.  Bill agrees to wear dresses again and be called by the previously discarded birth name “Billie.”  To add insult to injury, there is a triple straight wedding ceremony between Kurt & Prissy, Billie & Leslie, and Clint & Mattie, the gorgeous family cook.  I was hoping the cook would be revealed as a biological male, but nope, she’s a woman.  Then the very last page made me wonder if the author was ultimately trying to show how straight people are just as “abnormal” and sex-hungry as queer people.  If that is what it’s supposed to mean, I say, too little too late! 

In conclusion… I won ABNORMALS ANONYMOUS through an overpriced eBay auction, and no, I won’t tell you the amount of my accidental winning bid.  Let’s just say it had been a long time since I actually had to compete at an auction and I thought the price was far lower as I clicked the button which adds a dollar to the current highest bid.  So the double moral for today is…

Be careful what you bid on, because you just might win it…and…don’t judge a book by its awesome cover! 

Freak Out, 

JLH 

P.S. click a pic ⤵️ to read about far superior Vintage Gay Pulp Fiction…

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My queer words are available from an Amazon near you…

freakboy on film: DEEP JAWS / THE DICKTATOR (a Walt Davis double feature)

As you remember, or maybe you’ve blocked the disturbing incident out of your mind, I stumbled upon a Walt Davis triple feature earlier this year.  The three early 1970’s films left my mind reeling and saddled me with a morbid interest to see more.  Walt’s IMDb page is filled with eyebrow-raising titles, but two caught my half-blind eyes.  So the search was afoot! 

Something Weird Video had released DEEP JAWS and THE DICKTATOR as a double feature DVD in 2005, but it was out of print and out of my willing price range.  The film gods must have been watching over me because an eBay auction suddenly popped up.  It was a reasonable starting price, so I placed a bid for one dollar more.  For the third time in my eBay history, I won an auction by being the only bidder.  This may or may not have something to do with the sort of films I enjoy.  Anyhoo…as for this Walt Davis double feature…

DEEP JAWS (1976) 

screenplay by Walt Davis / directed by Perry Dell

Uranus Studios is on the brink of bankruptcy, even with the government financing a film about the U.S.-Soviet space race.  Realizing two of the biggest blockbusters in the last ten years was JAWS and DEEP THROAT, the studio decides to use some of the government money to simultaneously make a quick flick combining a disaster film with a porno.  Will Uranus Studios turn a profit or will both projects collapse under the craziness of demanding actors, an inebriated crew and oversexed studio heads?  Unlike the mermaids in the film, my lips are sealed.  

I watched DEEP JAWS in a state of bewilderment.  Even knowing the general plot, it took me a bit to figure out what the hell was going on.  The acting is over-the-top, which makes sense since the script is ridiculously absurd.  Overall, I think I enjoyed DEEP JAWS.  Well, at least there were inappropriate moments that made me laugh. 

THE DICKTATOR (1974, according to IMDb)  

screenplay by Walt Davis / directed by Perry Dell

To solve the problem of overpopulation, the United States government develops a temporary male birth control pill, but it ends up being a permanent solution.  Now the world leaders are demanding the U.S. President do something, but first he needs to play with his wind-up toys and take a dump in the Executive Bathroom.  Eventually five men, including a drag queen, who did not take the pill are located around the globe and are each christened The Dicktator.  Their mission is to impregnate fertile women…at any cost. 

This sociopolitical satire begins as a jarringly loud mess, far removed from political correctness, and doesn’t let up.  Unlike DEEP JAWS, THE DICKTATOR feels like it’s trying to say something about a lot of things.  Much like the script, the acting is all over the place, ranging from over-the-top to lackluster.  There are moments of absurd amusement, especially the spot-on jabs at the U.S. President, but some of the humor falls flat or is extremely uncomfortable.  I feel this is because the plot is more focused on sex and shocking the audience, but perhaps that was the whole point.   

I believe there are two reasons why DEEP JAWS and THE DICKTATOR are not as entertaining as the Walt Davis triple feature I reviewed in March.  First, this double feature lacks female lead characters, which made his other films far more interesting.  Second, Walt Davis did not direct DEEP JAWS and THE DICKTATOR, which is maybe why they still have their moments but aren’t quite as good.  Sort of like an Ed Wood script directed by someone else.  It’s still very much Ed Wood, but it lacks that magical spark.

In conclusion…

Neither DEEP JAWS nor THE DICKTATOR are an ideal introduction to Walt Davis.  Yet, if you’re in the mood for a couple of low-budget 1970’s softcore sexploitation flicks, they are strangely watchable in a different sort of way.  Just be sure to remove the stick before sitting down! 😉 

Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words. 

Freak Out, 

JLH 

P.S. click the pics ⤵️ to learn more about my other 1-bid eBay auction wins… 

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Visit the town of STURGEONS today! 📗 

Available from an Amazon near you!

booking freakboy: BUTCHER, BAKER NIGHTMARE MAKER by Joseph Burgo and Richard Natale

I first saw the film BUTCHER, BAKER NIGHTMARE MAKER back in 2019 and was surprised that the homophobic jerk cop wasn’t the hero of the story.  The story also dealt with homosexuality in a more understanding way than a lot of 1980’s films, horror or otherwise.  All of this did not prepare me for how wildly open and compassionate the novel would be when dealing with queer characters. 

The plot is essentially the same as the film.  Billy’s parents died in a spectacular car crash when he was 3 and then he was raised by his Aunt Cheryl.  He’s now 17 and is sort of seeing Julie, a peer from school who enjoys flirting with the class jerk.  Aunt Cheryl doesn’t approve of Julie or the possibility Billy may go to college on a basketball scholarship.  Just when Billy has enough drama in his life, he comes home one evening to witness Aunt Cheryl stabbing Phil, a television repairman, to death.  She claims the man was trying to rape her.

Detective Carlson, the jerk cop, doesn’t believe Cheryl and through his investigation, discovers that Phil had a male lover.  This is when the novel takes a slightly different turn than the film.  In the movie, the lover is Billy’s basketball coach.  In the book, it’s Billy’s English teacher Tom.  The novel explores this character’s love and grief for Phil more deeply than anything shown in the film.  The following excerpt from Chapter XV took my breath away, especially for a book published in 1981.  

Even by the end, despite Detective Carlson’s attempt to pin Phil’s death on Billy as some sort of jealous gay love triangle, the book never falters in portraying Tom in a sympathetic light.  The last chapter is from Tom’s perspective as Billy faces a jury trial for the bloodbath at Aunt Cheryl’s house.  Then, in a refreshingly poignant conclusion, Tom reflects on his love for Phil and prepares to start a new life in a new city.  Phil’s tragic death has ultimately given him the strength, courage and conviction to live openly as a gay man. 

I couldn’t figure out if the book came first or if it is a novelization of the film, but I assume the latter.  I also assume the thoughtful and compassionate moments came from Richard Natale.  A quick Amazon search showed he is the author of several queer-themed books, which I will definitely add to my ever-expanding reading list. 📚 

In conclusion…
I was lucky enough to find a copy of this book for $15 on eBay and it was worth every cent.  The story digs deeper into the motivations of all the characters, giving the plot an emotionally complex layer.  Yes, even Detective Carlson is more complex, but he’s still ultimately a jerk who gets what’s coming to him in the end.  So, if you are craving edge-of-your-seat suspense/horror or if you desire a lesser known piece of queer literature, then BUTCHER, BAKER NIGHTMARE MAKER is the book for you!  However, just say no to Aunt Cheryl’s milk! 🥛 

Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. click the pic ⤵️ for a great review of my latest book… 📗

freakboy on film: NECROMANIA: A TALE OF WEIRD LOVE (1971)

Most pics were taken from my old TV with my tablet, so excuse the poor quality.

Could it be fate or destiny that brought this film to me? 

Have I slid down a moist rabbit hole of 1970’s adult films starting with FLESHPOT ON 42ND STREET or LET MY PUPPETS COME?  

Was my morbid interest simply peaked after reading the Ed Wood bio NIGHTMARE OF ECSTASY? 

Whatever the reason, I located, watched and am now blogging about Ed Wood porn.  What else can I call it?  Sure, it’s predominantly hetero-centric, but how many strictly straight adult films name drop Bela Lugosi and include a coffin?  This is Ed Wood all the way! 

My new bedroom

(While I’m obviously not going to go into graphic detail, if anything you’ve just read offends, upsets or seriously freaks you out, stop reading this post and find a nice inspirational movie to feel safe with or something.) 

Glamorous 1970’s fashion icons!

Shirley and Danny are a young couple having a hard, or lack thereof, time of it in the bedroom.  Instead of going to a marriage therapist, they book a couple of days in the home of a necromancer.  You see, they are secretly not married (gasp) and it is the 1970’s.  What else would they do, especially in an Ed Wood film? 

Madame Heles (pronounced “heals”), presumably sleeping in her coffin, will not see the couple until the stroke of midnight, so to speak.  So, her assistant Tanya escorts the couple to their bedroom.  Shirley changes into a poofy nightgown and Danny slips into what appears to be silk pajama bottoms.  Alone and barely dressed, the young couple decide to try and couple again.  After this failed attempt at passion (“I might just as well have watched television.  That’s how much of a charge you give me.”), Shirley decides to explore Madame Heles’ abode, leaving Danny in the soft bed. 

When Shirley met Barb

Shirley bumps into a mummy dog and then bumps and grinds into Barb.  Seems Barb is a fellow “inmate” (client) of Madame Heles.  She must also work for the necromancer because Shirley’s first same sex experience is ultimately part of her sexual training.  
Tragically, Danny does not have a same sex experience.  Instead Tanya, after performing a ritual involving a skull suckling her mammaries, expertly instructs Danny in preparation for the meeting with Madame Heles.  Turns out that if Danny and Shirley fail to expand their horizons or whatever, they will end up lost forever, never finding satisfaction in the universal language of sex.  Will Madame Heles save Danny and Shirley from this frustrating existence? 

Not Brad & Janet

SPOILER ALERT!

At long last, the stroke of midnight is at hand.  Before the necromancer appears, Tanya and Barb perform a ritual make-out session in front of the coffin, as Danny and Shirley watch on.  After that allegedly titillating scene, which does not involve the skull,  Madame Heles finally awakens.  She opens her coffin, sits up and passes judgement on the young couple.  Shirley has graduated and will live only for sex.  However, Danny’s training is not complete and he will need to experience the personal teachings of Madame Heles.  This means only one thing.

Coffin sex! ⚰️ 

Criswell rising from the coffin would’ve made a great twist!

A reluctant Danny is grabbed by an underwear clad man, stripped of his silk pajama bottoms by Tanya and Barb, and then forced into the coffin.  The final scenes can best be summed up with, When the coffin’s a-rockin’, don’t come a-knockin’!  As the coffin lid closes on Danny and Madame Heles, the ending leaves the viewer with questions.  Did the coffin money shot mean Danny graduated?  Will Shirley and Danny be reunited or is the coffin his new permanent address?  Where did Shirley go anyway?  The world will sadly never know the answers, not even when you ask yourself what the hell you just watched.

Was it a happy one?

Ed may have used the pseudonym “Don Miller” but NECROMANIA is totally an Edward D. Wood, Jr. film!  His off-kilter writing and direction is obvious.  One bonus is there is even some legitimately funny dialogue between the young couple.  (Shirley to Danny: “Sometimes I think you’re more of an old woman than my mother.”)  Actors Rene Bond as Shirley and  Ric Lutze as Danny would feel right at home in an earlier, less “sexy” Ed Wood film.  They are easily the best actors here, which isn’t saying much, but a question rises, along with other things from the coffin.  Generally speaking, is the acting in NECROMANIA Ed Wood bad or just porn bad?  The answer probably depends upon the viewer.  I think it’s a mix of both. 

My biggest complaint is that Ed Wood didn’t fully embrace his crazy.  Aside from humorous bickering from the young couple and the intriguingly uncomfortable idea of coffin sex, most of NECROMANIA; A TALE OF WEIRD LOVE fails to live up to its title.  I mean, take PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE, GLEN OR GLENDA, or even TAKE IT OUT IN TRADE for example!  In those films, Ed’s special brand of crazy is vividly turned on.  In NECROMANIA, the crazy sporadically comes and goes, with flaccid moments in between.  

Waiting for Sarah Conner to destroy the Terminator skull

Speaking of flaccid, the surprisingly inexpensive DVD from Fleshbot Films I found on eBay includes two versions of the film.  Ed Wood himself called them the “Hot!” version and the “Hot! Hot! Hot!” version.  I question the accuracy of either designation, but I’m sure you can figure out the difference between them.  For transparency’s sake, the latter is what this review is based on.  

In conclusion…

What else can I really say?  If you are an Edward D. Wood, Jr. completist, then you must see NECROMANIA: A TALE OF WEIRD LOVE, even if the weirdest thing about it is the oddball music for the triple “Hot!” scenes, which ultimately makes perfect audio sense in an Ed Wood flick! 

Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  Click the pic ⤵️ to learn more about Ed Wood…

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My queer little books are available from an Amazon near you… 
viewAuthor.at/JohnLHarmon