Let the Nerding begin… (a KILLER NERD double feature)

 “I’m not a nerd!  I’m a geek!” - me (on multiple occasions) 

Even though my iPad’s definitions of “geek” and “nerd” are interchangeable, (a person who is extremely enthusiastic and knowledgeable about a particular subject), I’ve always believed there was a difference.  Maybe I feel “geeks” are somehow less uncool or maybe I just like the sound of the word.  “Nerd” drops like an uninspired bomb, while “Geek” floats with lyrical prose.  Plus, I like to say I “geek out” over my fave TV series and films.  I mean, nobody “nerds out” about anything other than maybe the tartly sweet 1980’s candy.  However, after all of my anti-nerd rhetoric, I experienced a massive shock to my personal identity when I sat down to watch a nerd-ish double feature. 

It’s Troma, so you know it’s classy

KILLER NERD (1991) 
written & directed by Mark Steven Bosko & Wayne Alan Harold 

Harold Kunkle is a nerd.  He’s mistreated at home, at work and on the streets.  What’s a nerd to do?  He orders audio cassettes from Slick Dick’s SCHOOL OF COOL, gets a makeover and paints the town red…with BLOOD!  You see, after his cool lessons fail to extinguish his nerdiness and he suffers more humiliation, Harold Kunkle snaps and goes on a killing spree.  

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the nerdiest of them all?

Toby Radloff (American Splendor) is full on nerd as Harold Kunkle.  He manages to make the nerd simultaneously pathetic and sympathetic and is THE reason to watch KILLER NERD.  This film is so beyond a DIY, low budget affair, it makes Jon Moritsugu’s films look like million dollar marvels.  Despite, or maybe because of the slow pacing and questionable acting, I enjoyed KILLER NERD way more than I feel I should have, especially when Harold is learning to be cool.

A killer do

BRIDE OF KILLER NERD(1992) 
written & directed by Mark Steven Bosko & Wayne Alan Harold 

Children are evil 

Harold Kunkle is trying to put his killing spree past behind him, but the ghosts of a few of his victims keep haunting him and neighborhood kids torment him with nerd taunts.  Just when you think Harold is going to commit suicide, he meets Thelma Crump, a lonely, bookish young woman who is a tormented senior in high school.  What are two nerds to do?  Fall in love, attend a senior house party, get humiliated and go on a killing spree together, of course.

Sweet and nerdy

Toby Radloff returns as Harold Kunkle and he is still full on nerd, and it’s interesting to watch him struggling with Harold’s past crimes.  Heidi Lohr as Thelma Crump is very memorable.  She gives Thelma a bit of sweet sympathy and an edge of cuckoo crazy.  Together, they are THE reason to watch BRIDE OF KILLER NERD.  This sequel is also low-budget, but the pace is quicker since the film is 15 minutes shorter.  The script is funnier and it technically might be a better film.  As with the first one, I enjoyed BRIDE OF KILLER NERD more than I should have, especially the scenes of nerds in love.

Flowers are a nerd’s best friend

In conclusion…
This Troma Team nerd-filled double feature DVD made me uncomfortable because it felt like I was seen.  Watching Harold Kunkle was a reminder of my long buried shame.  I was a nerd as a kid.  No, I didn’t have tape on my glasses or own a pocket protector, but I saw who I used to be in Harold.  Socially awkward.  Low self-esteem.  A less than snappy dresser.  Ok, fine, I’m still these things, but I will no longer be ashamed!  

I am a nerd! 🤓 

Now is the time for nerds and geeks to put down our Star Trek nitpicking, push up our four eyes (or six in my case) and unite against the so-called “cool” or “hip” people of the world!  We can be “with it” together and never be social outcasts again! 

Just don’t make me play Dungeons & Dragons.  I mean, I’m not that big of nerd! 

Oops… 🫢

Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words.

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  A special thanks to Barry of Cinematic Catharsis for putting KILLER NERD on my radar with his review of AMERICAN SPLENDOR! 

P.P.S.  Click the pic ⤵️ for a different post about a very different Troma double feature…

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My books & blogs…  
http://thejlhcollective.blogspot.com/2018/03/the-collective.html

freakboy on film: TERMINAL DEGENERATION: The Films of Jon Moritsugu

I had never heard of Jon Moritsugu until opening an email from Vinegar Syndrome, which has become my back-alley film fix destination.  Three things peaked my interest.  First, I instantly found the funky-indie-cool cover of the blu-ray box set very appealing.  Second, the description of one of the films as a DIY version of BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE DOLLS more than intrigued me.  Third, the crazy trailer for the box set secured my desire to learn more about this writer/director. 

What did I learn about Jon Moritsugu? 

I learned MY DEGENERATION (1989) really is, in its own way, a DIY version of BVD, by way of David Lynch and Gregg Araki.  Three young women form a  rock band, achieve success (thanks to the meat industry) and then struggle with the pitfalls of fame, drugs and love of what appears to be a pig’s head.  MY DEGENERATION is a bizarre and amusing introduction to Jon Moritsugu.  Also, I love the music and the out there audio effects!

I learned HIPPY PORN (1991) is neither about hippies nor porn.  If you enjoy allegedly nihilistic, pseudo-intellectual young adults whining about the existential nothingness of their disenfranchised lives, then HIPPY PORN is the film for you.  This was the hardest for me to sit through because it feels tediously overlong and self-indulgent, but the “Accentuate the Positive” musical moment is rather brilliant.  HIPPY PORN also made me almost regret this purchase because the opening scene involves a dead animal, which hopefully wasn’t killed for the purpose of this film.  Watch at your own risk. 

I learned TERMINAL USA (1993) is Jon Moritsugu’s CITIZEN KANE.  Funded by and airing on PBS (the “Sesame Street” network), the story focuses on one very strange day in the life of an Asian-American family, culminating in a household full of cheerleaders, skinheads, a drug dealer and an alien.  Freaky, funky and funny, TERMINAL USA may be the best in this box set and must have inspired Gregg Araki’s NOWHERE (1997). 

I learned MOD F**K EXPLOSION (1994) is another Gregg Araki-style film about two oddball gangs out for a clash and the young woman stuck in the middle, who just wants a leather jacket.  Low-key weird, occasionally hard to follow and inappropriately funny, MOD F**K EXPLOSION is definitely happening in the same universe as TERMINAL USA, but doesn’t quite reach its surreal symmetry.  Still totally worth watching though!

I learned FAME WHORE (1997) might be my favorite Jon Moritsugu film.  The Gregg Araki/David Lynch vibes have fallen away to reveal a quirky, funny and strangely touching look at the danger of notoriety, the desire for success and the damage of loneliness.  After a catchy theme song, we are presented with three interesting characters.  A tennis pro dealing with scandalous (at the time) gay rumors, a young woman (Moritsugu’s wife & collaborator Amy Davis) who fancies herself a Jill-of-all-trades in the entertainment industry and a young man working alongside an imaginary friend (a giant mascot dog) at an animal shelter never meet, but in some indescribable way seem connected in their separate stories.  FAME WHORE surprised me, made me laugh and even broke my heart a bit. 

I learned SCUMROCK (2002) is ironic.  After so many films with a Gregg Araki vibe, a Gregg Araki actor (James Duval) FINALLY appears in a Jon Moritsugu film, but it’s the least like a Gregg Araki film.  Two stories, briefly connecting in the middle, revolve around a young woman trying to make a name for her rock band and a young man trying to make his first film.  SCUMROCK is slow-paced, but amusing, with a sort of happy ending that feels true.

I learned PIG DEATH MACHINE (2013) isn’t as horrifying as the title suggests.  It’s a goofy story about the strange side effects a ditsy blond and a dishwasher experience after eating bad pork at a restaurant.  The ditsy blond’s IQ rises and the dishwasher can suddenly hear plants talking.  My only complaint is I don’t understand why the dishwasher never tries to talk to the plants who are talking to her.  In the end, PIG DEATH MACHINE is an amusing finale to this box set, especially with the surprising and fun stop-motion animation sequence! 

In conclusion… 
Overall, I’m glad I learned about Jon Moritsugu and his eclectic films.  They are very DIY.  The acting is not always great.  The characters are not always likable.  However, much like an Andy Milligan film, there is an honesty underneath the weirdness and absurdity.  Yes, even in HIPPY PORN, including in that tough to watch opening scene.  So, if you are into ultra low-budget, seriously indie cinema, then TERMINAL DEGENERATION: The Films of Jon Moritsugu may be the box set for you! 
Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words.

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  In case you missed my latest video for The FreakOptic Files… 

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My books & blogs…  
http://thejlhcollective.blogspot.com/2018/03/the-collective.html

No time for blogging…

Shouldn’t he be reviewing another STAR WARS film right about now?  Where is a new poem, of sorts?  Why hasn’t he obsessively blogged about Andy Milligan lately? 

I hope these are the prevalent questions in your mind, but don’t freak out!  They will all happen, sooner or later.  I’ve just been busy lately.  I mean, STURGEONS (the complete serials) won’t plug itself.  Well, maybe it can with a few fantastic reader photos! 📗 😍

Feline Approved!

Then I have a book signing event approaching like a noose slowly tightening around my throat.  It’s more of a meet & greet situation where readers will approach me, grab a cookie and (hopefully) pick up an autographed copy of STURGEONS.  I’m not sure if anyone will turn up, but I hope so.  I mean, the article in the Custer County Chief should draw out a few curious folk or at least Ms. Minch! 

Kim, a groovy librarian, designed this awesome flyer!

Yes, I was interviewed for the local paper.   Managing Editor Mona Weatherly wrote a great article about STURGEONS, my vision loss and my writing in general.  The headline, Author fights to get back to writing ‘fun, quirky’ stories is newspaper perfection!  Here are the photos which appeared on a different page than the article.  The purple one is my Amazon Author Page pic and the orange one was taken by Mona.  She said I looked like a proud author, but I said I looked positively goofy, as usual.  

Courtesy Custer County Chief 

To top it all off, I no longer deliver bad news 🗞️ around town.  It was time for that part of my life to end and I definitely won’t miss it this winter. ❄️  My predicted post-Covid 19 career of peddling my wares at a truck stop never manifested, but I am getting wet at a local diner instead.  Yes, I am now a visually impaired dishwasher 🍽️ by day and a queer indie author ✏️ by night!  

I saw the sign!  Well, my sister saw it and told me about it.

Plus, thanks to Vinegar Syndrome and AGFA, I just started digging into the films of Jon Moritsugu.  From what I’ve experienced so far, his very DIY/experimental films are like Gregg Araki and David Lynch had an allegedly nihilistic, pseudo-intellectual punk rock baby.  In other words, this box set is going to take a bit and challenge me along the way. 

Well, until I blog about whether my book event is a pop 👍 or a flop 👎, thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  Here is the first review of STURGEONS on Goodreads…