Tuesday, July 7, 2026

freakboy on film: CANNIBAL GIRLS (1973)


Red cover of cannibal girls, with images of the film.
A fresh, young couple take a trip and end up having car problems in a quaint, small town.  The inhabitants of this quaint, small town seem odd, yet nice enough, but maybe they simply want to have outsiders over as dinner.  Will the fresh, young couple escape or wind up as leftovers? 
A van with a sign that states meet in big red letters. Another sign says we deliver in black letters in a scene from cannibal girls.
Tragically, it’s not 1970s horror porn!
I couldn’t resist ordering CANNIBAL GIRLS from Vinegar Syndrome, partly because of the fun title, but mostly for the two leads.  I mean, the fresh, young couple are portrayed by Eugene Levy (Schitt‘s Creek) and Andrea Martin (Black Christmas), both of SCTV fame.  Then throw in Ivan Reitman (Ghostbusters) as the director and CANNIBAL GIRLS should have been a tasty treat. 
Andrea Martin eat some meat in a scene from cannibal girls.
Miss Manners does not approve!

Should being the operative word.
 
I found CANNIBAL GIRLS to be unbearably slow, with little suspense or humor.  Should I blame director Ivan Reitman?  Should I blame screenplay writer Robert Sandler?  (I can’t in good conscience blame Mr. Sandler since IMDb credits him as writing a handful of episodes of the original Fraggle Rock.)  Maybe I should just blame the cast because, according to IMDB, most of the dialogue was…shudder…improvised. 
A man looks confused or scared in a scene from cannibal girls.
Me watching improv.
In conclusion…
The most interesting thing about CANNIBAL GIRLS is Eugene Levy’s hair. 
Eugene Levy has a handlebar mustache and a head of big poofy curly hair in a scene from cannibal girls.
The new Jan Brady!
Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  click the Cannibal Daddy pic for more cannibals… 👇
John Saxon uses the phone shirtless in cannibals in the street.
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My books from Amazon…

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8 comments:

  1. Barry P.July 7, 2026 at 12:56 PM

    I agree with you, John. I recently re-watched this to see if I missed anything, but alas, I found it somewhat lacking a second time. It was fun to see Levy and Martin in early roles, though.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. John L. HarmonJuly 7, 2026 at 1:49 PM

      Thanks, Barry! I am relieved that I’m not alone in feeling Cannibal Girls is not as good as it should be. Levy and Martin are the only reasons to watch.

      Delete
  2. AnonymousJuly 7, 2026 at 1:30 PM

    I think I can safely say you've saved hours of my life I would never have gotten back.
    Great review

    ReplyDelete
  3. Realweegiemidget ReviewsJuly 8, 2026 at 2:26 AM

    My favourite pic of John Saxon I should so make that my screensaver... He will now always be Cannibal daddy to me thanks to that post and your choice of picture.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. John L. HarmonJuly 13, 2026 at 6:00 AM

      Cannibal Daddy deserves to be a screensaver!!.,

      Delete
  4. Brian SchuckJuly 12, 2026 at 5:23 PM

    Exploitation pics should never, ever be improvised ( shudder)! It's good that the principal players of this misfire got it out of their system early in their careers. Thanks John, for warning us off of this one in case it should pop up.on Tubi or YouTube!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. John L. HarmonJuly 13, 2026 at 6:02 AM

      Thanks, Brian and you are welcome!
      I had high hopes, but was so disappointed.

      Delete

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