freakboy on film: EMBRYO (1976)

This post is for THE FAVORITE STARS IN B MOVIES BLOGATHON, hosted by Brian of Films From Beyond!  

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Somewhere between making bedroom eyes at Doris Day in the forerunner to the rom-com and kissing Linda Evans on the diva-drenched nighttime soap Dynasty, Rock Hudson starred in this slice of ‘70’s cheese.  Actually, that might be offensive to cheese because a truly cheesy film can be entertaining.  EMBRYO is just bad.  No, not even in a so bad it’s good way.   

Rock Hudson questions his career choices

The so-called plot centers around widowed Dr. Paul Holliston (Rock Hudson) experimenting with accelerated embryo growth in his mansion’s basement laboratory.  First a canine embryo, which grows quickly into an intelligent killer.  Then a human embryo, which also grows into an intelligent killer.  Oh, but of course the human embryo also grows into an attractive young woman (Barbara Carrera) he names Victoria Spencer.  

Thou shall not watch this film sober

After Paul stabilizes the growth serum, he introduces Victoria as his assistant.  While Paul’s son and pregnant daughter-in-law don’t seem to mind the newcomer, someone else minds very much.  Martha Douglas (Diane Ladd) is Paul’s sister-in-law and sees green the moment she lays eyes on his new assistant.  Even Victoria almost beating a smug chess champ (Roddy McDowall) fails to impress Martha.  

Diane Ladd can’t remember if she’s in this film 

Victoria eventually assists Paul in the bedroom and that’s when the plot sort of finally kicks in.  She starts craving more of the growth serum, even asking a massive 1970’s super-computer for help.  Martha grows more and more suspicious as the dog growls menacingly at her.  Paul mainly seems oblivious as he feels proud of and physically attracted to his scientific achievement.  No, not the dog, but that would make for a startling twist, which this movie desperately needs. 

No, I don’t want no damn Scooby snack!

Seriously, despite its star power, EMBRYO fails to deliver and I blame screenwriters Anita Doohan and Jack W. Thomas, along with director Ralph Nelson.  The pacing is so slow it doesn’t exist.  There is too much reliance on pseudo-scientific voiceover narration.  To top it off, the character development is sketchy and the backstory of Paul’s wife is never fully explored.  I feel the movie is trying to be serious instead of embracing the schlock that it really is. 

How much is that doggie embryo in the window?

The acting is fine, but not overly engaging.  Like the script, everyone is playing it so low-key that they barely register a pulse.  Rock Hudson sheds his romantically charismatic leading man persona for a nice but sad doctor.  He should’ve stuck with fun, frothy comedies, but like Veronica Lake in FLESH FEAST (1970), former silver screen darlings were often relegated to bottom-of-the-barrel B-movies during this time period.  Diane Ladd should’ve added some punch as the jealous sister-in-law, but I had completely forgotten she was even in this movie.  Barbara Carrera, as the title character, manages to be believable as a menacing innocent, but it’s not enough to stop the viewer from nearly slipping into a coma.  The appearance of Roddy McDowall in a memorably boring party scene might perk up the viewer for a bit, but his exaggerated facial movements will make you wonder if he spent too many years acting in PLANET OF THE APES make-up. 

Roddy McDowall (left) patiently waits for FRIGHT NIGHT to save his career

In conclusion…
Rock Hudson may not have shined as brightly as he did in his Doris Day glory days, but he was still Rock Hudson.  Maybe he would’ve done better with a better script.  
As for the film, if you’re suffering from insomnia, fluff your pillows and tuck yourself in because EMBRYO might just be the cure you need! 

SIDE NOTE:  
EMBRYO contains scenes involving dogs and a fish which may be upsetting to some viewers. 

Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  Cinematic Catharsis & Realweegiemidget Reviews will take you to the FUTURE! 

COMING SOON TO A BLOG NEAR YOU! 

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