The New Halloween

Give up the ghosts 
The goblins and ghouls 
Creatures that go 
Bump in the night 
Forget the vampires 
The zombies and werewolves 
Monsters that may 
Give you a fright
The scariest thing 
Of scary things 
Is waiting 
Outside your door  
The news is the new 
Horror Reality Show 
Just sit right down 
Tickets aren’t free 
All you need 
Is to be 
Deceived 
Confused 
Alive  
In the year 
Of our doom 
2025  

~~~~~~~~~~~~
2025, John L. Harmon 

Happy Halloween or something… 🎃 

Freak Out, 
JLH  

P.S. Escape the current reality with a good book! 📚 

booking freakboy: BEST MOVIE EVER (An Oral History of Deborah Kaplan and Harry Elfont's "Josie and the Pussycats”) by Russ Burlingame

I confess! 

I didn’t instantly love the 2001 film of JOSIE AND THE PUSSYCATS when I saw it during its theatrical run.  My 20-something ass was planted in that AMC theater seat in Omaha, Nebraska because of Parker Posey.  Sure, I was familiar with reruns of the animated series, but my obsession with the PARTY GIRL actor was first and foremost in my mind.  

I remember overall liking the movie, enjoying the music and thinking this was the best use of Parker Posey in a mainstream film.  As the days, weeks and months unfolded, I kept thinking about what I experienced.  Dots were slowly connecting in my mind and by the time JOSIE AND THE PUSSYCATS was available to rent at Hollywood Video, I realized I didn’t like the film, I LOVED IT!  So, I quickly rented a VHS copy to confirm my cinematic love and was met with negativity at the front counter.  As I sat the videotape down, the clerk at Hollywood Video announced that the movie sucked.  I immediately responded how I thought it was great!  Nothing more was said and I went back to my apartment to cleanse the negativity from my cinematic soul. 

Hallelujah!  My second viewing proved to me how clever, funny and wildly entertaining JOSIE AND THE PUSSYCATS really was!  I initially purchased it on VHS and tried to spread the Gospel of the Pussycats, but nobody seemed to appreciate its brilliance.  Friends whined that the movie wasn’t just like the cartoon or they just didn’t get it, often complaining about all the product placements throughout the film.  So, I drifted like a lone iceberg in my love and obsession over this film, eventually upgrading to DVD, and recently Blu-ray.  In 2019, I wrote a brief blogpost giving 4 reasons to see JOSIE AND THE PUSSYCATS and I realized I wasn’t alone.  There were other fans out there!  I didn’t realize how many until I stumbled upon the book BEST MOVIE EVER by Russ Burlingame when the author liked one of my random Josie-related post on Bluesky.  (Hmmm…maybe I should start ❤️-ing every sturgeons-related post out there… 🤔) 

BEST MOVIE EVER is an entertaining deep-dive into all things JOSIE, primarily focusing on the 2001 film, obviously.  Readers will hear from fans, behind the scenes crew, music creators, the writers/directors and the actors, though, tragically, not Parker Posey.  Even without direct comments from the reason I watched the film, BEST MOVIE EVER is an incredible book full of everything you wanted to know about JOSIE AND THE PUSSYCATS!  You may even find a few surprises within the pages.  For example, I’m currently reading the novelization I never knew existed!  Plus, I’ll never not know the boy band b4-4 and never unsee their video Get Down, which is cut from the same cloth as DuJour’s Backdoor Lover!

In conclusion…
If you like or love or are obsessed with JOSIE AND THE PUSSYCATS, you need to read BEST MOVIE EVER by Russ Burlingame!  I promise it’s totally jerkin’! 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  click a pic ⤵️ for more JOSIE… 😺

For Andy…

His acidic words 
Like a salve  
On my being 
Shouting in hate
Swarming in lust  
Swirling in violence 
Screaming in vain 
Quiets the voices 
Hacking away under 
My volatile mindskin 
Calming what passes 
For a kindred soul 
In this malformed body 
Feeling tethered 
To a forgotten ghost 
Flickering wet night terrors 
Leaving me satiated 
Until the creeping silence 
Becomes severe whispers 
Abruptly intensifying 
Wailing for more  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~
2025, John L. Harmon 

_____________
I wrote this tribute to late filmmaker Andy Milligan while “songs from a holographic mind” by Matthew Nowik burrowed deep within my nervous system. 

click to listen on bandcamp 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. click a pic ⤵️ for more Andy…  

freakboy on film: RETURN OF THE JEDI (1983)

Well, here we are for the ultra-sudsy Original Trilogy conclusion of a space opera from a long time ago and far, far away.  

Han Solo is now home furnishing decor for the palace of the literally sluggish gangster Jabba the Hutt, and everyone is out to rescue him.  Lando Calrissian is already in the palace, undercover as a very human guard.  C-3PO and R2-D2 show up with a message from Luke Skywalker, but end up as Jabba’s pointless translator droid and cocktail waitress, respectively.  Then Leia Organa turns up disguised as a tiny, but threatening bounty hunter, with Chewbacca as a prisoner.  Finally, Luke Skywalker arrives, rockin’ his late aunt’s hairdo, so this convoluted plan to save Han can get started.  (SPOILER ALERT)  They rescue Han.  If this comes as a surprise to you, then you have obviously never seen a movie before.  

Have you been living under a chunk of Carbonite?

The rest of RETURN OF THE JEDI is basically A NEW HOPE and THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK, but with Ewoks.  There’s another Death Star to blow-up.  There’s another trap, or two or three.  There’s another family revelation.  By the end, it feels more than a little been there, done that. 

Can we go home now?

I could complain about Ewoks, but that’s too easy.  I could complain how the harsh lighting makes Yoda look like a Muppet, not to mention all of the other Muppet-ish characters, but the 1994 film CLERKS already summed it up perfectly.  I could complain about the lack of character development and a generally uneven script.  Instead, I’ll complain about one moment in RETURN OF THE JEDI that has become my least favorite scene in the Original Trilogy, if not all 9 episodes! 

Are they going to kiss again?

It’s evening at the Ewok village and Luke is in a mood.  Leia asks him what’s wrong and this leads to Luke revealing to Leia that they are brother and sister.  Leia says that somehow she always knew, which means that deep kiss in THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK is full-tilt incestuous!  Plus, to kick off this painfully written and acted conversation, Luke asks Leia if she remembers her real mother.  Wait, what?  Where in HOPE or EMPIRE did Leia hint that she was adopted?  To confuse matters even more, Leia claims to remember her real mother being beautiful but sad.  Well, REVENGE OF THE SITH would later make Leia delusional or a liar because their mother dies after giving birth to the twins!  Maybe it’s that Obi-Wan Kenobi gibberish about something being true, from a certain point of view.   In my view, that’s just a way to cover up lies or massive holes in the plot!  

Does Mon Mothma approve of plot holes and incest?

That being said, there are things to enjoy in RETURN OF THE JEDI.  It’s awesome that it is Leia who strangles Jabba the Hutt, especially since he was probably the worm who forced her to wear that skimpy outfit.  One of the more surprising aspects, for a 1983 film, is the Rebel Alliance leader is a woman.  Mon Mothma, as portrayed by Caroline Blakiston in her brief scene, is strong, direct and compassionate.  Then there is the real reason to watch RETURN OF THE JEDI…The Emperor!  Rarely has a villain been so seductively evil.  Unlike most of the actors in JEDI, Ian McDiarmid delivers his surprisingly well-written lines in a subtle fashion, especially when The Emperor is tempting Luke to the Dark Side.  His voice oozes with emotional manipulation and cruelty.  Honestly, his scenes feel like they are taking place in a better film. 

How do you like my Dark Side?

In conclusion… 

Episode VI may not be the worst film in the STAR WARS franchise, but it is definitely the weakest in the Original Trilogy.  Should we blame George Lucas and co-screenwriter Lawrence Kasdan?  Does director Richard Marquand share the responsibility for its deficiencies?  Maybe all of the above, but there’s still entertainment to be found.  So, if you crave some sci-fi escapism from the current reality, then pull up a chair and watch RETURN OF THE JEDI.  Just make sure to watch the original 1983 version.  The not-so “Special Edition” managed to make a not-so great film even worse! 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  In memoriam…Boba Fett (1978-1983) 
You died for the sake of a burp joke, but you’ll always be the baddest badass bounty hunter in our galactic hearts! 🖤 

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know the character has appeared in later versions of STAR WARS, so just shut your nerd mouths and let me have this moment! 
~~~~~~~~~~~
Click a pic ⤵️ for more of the Original Trilogy… 

The Handy-Dandy Helpful Junk Jaunt Doomsday Guide!

Are you living in constant fear that the psychopaths disguised as world leaders will carelessly start World War III? 

Are you scared that the interstellar visitors in our solar system are comets or asteroids heading for a direct impact with Earth? 

Are you freaking out that those interstellar visitors might actually be an alien invasion fleet coming to conquer humanity?  

Well, if you answered YES to any of those End-of-the-World Scenarios… 

FEAR NO MORE!  

All your Doomsday Preparation Needs can be found along the Junk Jaunt in Broken Bow, Nebraska! 

Enter at your own risk!

Stock your Fallout Shelter  Pantry with a 15 ounce can of crisp, refreshing water because less is more!  

Just skim the rust off!

Grab a Geiger counter to aid in detecting those pesky radiation leaks in your DIY Fallout Shelter! 

Safety first!

Pick up a homemade figurine to support a local artist and to brighten up your otherwise drab Fallout Shelter! 

Stylish & inevitable!

If you don’t have a Fallout Shelter, just Duck and Cover!  

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  Don’t forget to stock your Fallout Shelter Library with titles you’ll want to read over and over again during the Alien Occupation or Nuclear Winter, whichever comes first! 

Future post-apocalyptic bestsellers!

channel freakboy: THE SNOOP SISTERS (1972-1974)

Before Jessica Fletcher started suspiciously turning up whenever a murder occurs, there was mystery novelist Ernesta Snoop and her sister Gwendolyn (call her “G”) Snoop Nicholson, who happily types out Ernesta’s manuscripts.  Through five 90 minute episodes, this duo solved murders, found suspected dead persons alive and even proved their own innocence in an attempted murder!  They did all of this surrounded by familiar faces, such as Vincent Price, Roddy McDowall, Geraldine Page, Jill Clayburgh, Bert Convy, Bo Svenson, Bernie Casey, Katherine Helmand, and Alice Cooper.  Yes, you read that correctly!  Alice Cooper even performs a song and does a bit of decent acting! 

I found THE SNOOP SISTERS at a thrift store during a day trip in a different town.  Neither my sister nor I had ever heard of this series.  I initially thought it was British, but when my sister read the back, I realized I was wrong.  According to the box, THE SNOOP SISTERS was part of a rotating NBC Mystery Movie series, which explains the limited number of lengthy episodes.  

Helen Hayes as Ernesta and Mildred Natwick as “G” have fantastic sisterly chemistry.  They finish each other sentences and sometimes communicate without even completing a sentence.  If they overhear their police detective nephew discussing the case as they are leaving a room, they turn around in unison to overhear more.  Together, they make for a delightfully quirky duo who will not stop until the mystery is solved. 

The pilot episode, “The Female Instinct” (S1 E0, according to IMDb) is the best in the short-lived series.  The story revolves around a former movie star who is murdered after she announces the impending publication of a scandalous tell-all book.  Ernesta and “G” knew the woman, so they take it upon themselves to investigate, with the occasional assistance of their ex-con chauffeur.  Eccentric characters come and go, culminating with all the suspects gathered in a drawing room for the big reveal.  It seems like a typical whodunit, but the charming idiosyncrasies of Ernesta and “G” elevate the plot.  Plus, the sisters get to pursue the murderer in their 1930’s Lincoln as their nephew pursues them in a commandeered ice cream truck!  

The best thing about the pilot episode is it allows THE SNOOP SISTERS to naturally be their quirky, curious, incisive selves, with verbal word play that is clever and funny.  With maybe the exception of “Fear is a Free-Throw” (S1 E2), where “G” is a prime suspect in an attempted murder, the other episodes tone down their quirky charm and instead focus more on the guest stars or placing the sisters in silly situations.  I mean, yes, it is amusing to see Ernesta and “G” dressed up as the Frankenstein monster and his Bride in “A Black Day for Bluebeard” (S1 E4), but it lacks that special something from the pilot. 

In conclusion… 
THE SNOOP SISTERS may not become my favorite mystery series, but it is an enjoyable early ‘70’s romp.  All of the guest stars are fun, but the title characters are the reason to watch.  When Ernesta and “G” are allowed to take the spotlight, they shine bright with eccentric glitter.  So, pull up a cozy chair and enjoy THE SNOOP SISTERS as they snoop and snoop and snoop!  

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. In case you’re an Alice Cooper completist, the rock legend appears in “The Devil Made Me Do It” (S1 E3) 

freakboy on film: WEAPONS (2025)

⚠️WARNING⚠️ 
I’m gonna spoil the shit out of this film!

written & directed by Zach Cregger 

The only things I knew about WEAPONS before catching a matinee were the title and that it was horror/suspense.  Maybe I had a vague notion of the plot centering around kids because of the shadows on the poster that I briefly glanced at without my Mad Scientist Glasses, so any text went undeciphered. 

WEAPONS is about almost all the kids in a classroom not showing up for school one morning.  Only Justine Gandy, the new teacher, and one shy student are there, followed by a town full of questions and accusations.  All that is known is the missing kids walked…well…more ran out of their homes at 2:17 AM and never came back.  Maybe they were running away from this movie?  The story unfolds from different perspectives, which I liked, culminating in an ending that goes on too long.  

Other things I liked include Amy Madigan as Aunt Gladys.  Initially, it’s like she’s channeling Katherine Helmond as Jessica Tate in the sitcom SOAP (1977-1981), but her kind, mildly ditzy personality is all a (witch)crafty ruse.  

Another thing I liked was the surprise inclusion of a same-sex couple!  LGBTQ+ representation in the horror genre has come a long way, but it’s still feels rare.  That being said, have we come far enough in rights and being accepted to have the only queer representation in WEAPONS brutally killed without having a conversation about it, especially with the current political climate?  

This brings me to something  I didn’t like, besides the goofy scenes of kids running into the dark, the predictable jump scares, the long ending and a lack of explanation over how exactly the missing, spellbound kids loitering around a basement were going to cure an ailing old witch.  I mean, she was obviously not eating them and the kids didn’t seem to be aging if she was  siphoning their youth, but whatever.  As that ending never seemed to end, a realization dawned in my, perhaps, oversensitive mind.  All the characters who died in WEAPONS would be considered “sinners” in the self-righteous minds of right-wing religious whackjobs.  There’s an unfaithful husband, a junkie thief, a gay couple and a witch.  As the admittedly unique ending credits scrolled up at angles, I seriously pondered whether or not I just watched a piece of heteronormative, conservative Christian claptrap disguised as a horror film.  The big flaw in my borderline outrage logic is if my pondering was correct, the teacher would’ve died because she had an affair with the unfaithful husband.  History has proven time and time again that right-wing religious whackjobs would label a woman in this position a harlot or temptress and blame her for everything. 

So, the teacher not dying probably proves my pondering wrong, but the possibility of being correct leaves a distasteful taste in my mouth.  It doesn’t help that I reside in a conservative religious town, in a conservative religious state, in a country currently gunning for right-wing whackjob supremacy.  Can you blame me if my bigotry alert radar is set on high?  I mean, just look at the itsy-bitsy religious propaganda popping up around my already holier-than-thou town for Christ’s sake! 😏 

In conclusion…
If my spoilers and ponderings haven’t ruined it for you, I suppose WEAPONS isn’t the worst way to spend over two hours of your life.  (Did it need to be that long?  No.)  There is some humor and the different perspectives keep things interesting for a bit, but save some soda and popcorn for the never-ending ending.  You’re gonna need some energy to stay focused! 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  Julia Garner as Justine Gandy in WEAPONS made me visually think of a young Parker Posey donning a bad blond wig and glasses from a different decade.