Saturday, February 15, 2020

booking freakboy: LUST, SIMON by John Valjean

Simon Spears is just a typical 18 year old.  He has a loving family and a close circle of friends.  Oh, and he's gay, but he hasn't come out to his nearest and dearest yet because Simon doesn't want them to see him as anyone other than himself.  When a fellow classmate, calling himself Bleu, comes out on the website Freaky Secrets, Simon contacts him using the name Jean.  They make an emotional connection, sharing their experiences of secretly being gay in a straight world, all while remaining anonymous.  Who is Bleu?  Is he a classmate from the drama club  or is he a jock?  Is Bleu one of the countless lovers Simon experiences as he explores his voracious sexual appetite in this literary porn parody of  LOVE, SIMON? 

Author John Valjean weaves  an erotic take on the hit film as Simon takes on a steady stream of sturdy studs while pining away for the elusive Bleu.  Mr. Valjean manages to balance romantic sweetness with explicit erotic encounters, making LUST, SIMON a literary porno where the reader actually cares about the characters. 

If you're 18 years of age or older, and get a kink from porn parodies, then LUST, SIMON by John Valjean may be the book for you! 

LUST, SIMON and other books by John Valjean are available from...




Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind review.

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. A different book by a different author...
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Don't forget to examine The Collective Eye for February!
👁

Friday, February 7, 2020

freakboy muses music: JOANNA (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)

A freakboy confession... 
I'm obsessed with soundtracks.  Consider the fact my desert island disc isn't from Julie Brown, The B-52's, Garbage, The Anchoress or even Perry Como.  I would want the soundtrack to BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE DOLLS to keep me company while stranded in the middle of the ocean.

I'm so obsessed that I own soundtracks to films I've never seen.  For a time, JOANNA was one of them, but I finally saw the 1968 film years ago and it was an enjoyable, trippy romp, but it was the music that truly captured my soul.  Maybe it's because I experienced the soundtrack before the film. 

The only reason I ever heard of this obscure cinematic gem is because it shares a director (Michael Sarne) with the infamous MYRA BRECKINRIDGE.  This knowledge was learned back in my younger, Omaha days and I searched high and low for a VHS or DVD copy of JOANNA.  I didn't find the film, but I unearthed the soundtrack on vinyl.  It was love at first listen. 


I spent many a night alone just losing myself in the words and music of Rod McKuen.  Instrumental music ranging from blistering optimistic joy to hauntingly bittersweet melancholy filled my ears, but it wasn't lonely.  I had Rod McKuen's words to keep me company.  He provided the vocal to one of my favorite songs from the album.

I'll Catch the Sun is an achingly beautiful song about finding anyone who understands.  It's a simple song expressing complex emotions and the lyrics are rather daring for 1968.  Rod McKuen uses the pronoun he when describing that anyone.  I initially obsessed over this subtle, singular moment for days, if not weeks.

Another song I really enjoy, even though it goes against the cynical, pessimistic persona I try to display, is Ain't You Glad You're Living Joe.  Director Michael Sarne provided the vocals and he manages to evoke the creamy, dreamy last days of summer.  

There is also Hello Heartaches, vocals provided by Barbara Kay.  Her sultry voice, along with the mellow music, sends us to a smokey, underground cabaret, populated by lost, lonely souls. 

My younger, Omaha days are far behind me and so is my record player.  I had not listened to JOANNA for many years and I really wanted to experience the soundtrack again.  I couldn't find it streaming anywhere, so I turned to Amazon.  I discovered that a CD of the soundtrack to the 1968 British film had been released in Japan, which, despite the absurdity, didn't surprise me.  After sorting past the heart-stopping expensive copies, I found one for around $10, shipping from Japan.  I placed my order and figured I would be waiting for a whole month as JOANNA made her way across the ocean.


Shockingly, the CD arrived in approximately two and a half weeks and it was in like-new condition.  Even more shockingly, I didn't pop in the disc right away.  I waited until evening, when the world had fallen into silence.  Then I slipped on my purple enhanced headphones and was transported back to my old Omaha apartment.


Miss Kitty traveled with me through time, which was perfection.  One of the songs I sing to her, yes I sing to my cats, is a slight variation of the title song to JOANNA

🎵Miss Kitty, Miss Kitty 
You sure look cute to me 
Miss Kitty, Miss Kitty 
A sweet sight for these tired eyes to see 
You fill my heart with hope 
Your tail's like Cinemascope 
And uh-oh, Miss Kitty 
You're the top banana to me🎵

In conclusion, I may have shared too much.  Also, the JOANNA CD was amazing because it was a far more complete soundtrack than the vinyl album.  Seriously, I think the CD was over an hour long! 

Better watch out, BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE DOLLS, there may be a new desert island disc in town!  ;) 



Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words.

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. I will be blogging about MYRA BRECKINRIDGE later this month for The Second So Bad It's Good Blogathon, hosted by Taking Up Room.
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Monday, February 3, 2020

booking freakboy: GHOST STORIES by Antara Roy O

Who watches us from dark corners?  What goes bump in the night?  Is a friendly stranger all that he or she appears to be?  Author Antara Roy O weaves seven tales of the supernatural that dare to answer these questions. 

Two tales from GHOST STORIES really stood out for me.  THE GIRL BY THE LAKE is about two friends who encounter a mysterious young woman who asks for a ride home.  This tale captures the uneasy eeriness of encountering a stranger in the dark.and leaves you speculating on the motive of the young woman.  A FRIEND IN THE MOUNTAIN is about a reporter and a photographer who stumble upon a story from an old man concerning a benevolent spirit.  There is a beautiful, almost magical element to this tale which appealed to me.

If you enjoy taking brief literary excursions into the paranormal, then GHOST STORIES by Antara Roy O may be the e-book for you! 

Available from...





Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind review.

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. The Collective Eye for February is open!

Thursday, January 30, 2020

Prolific Creative Bunnies (January 2020 in Hindsight)


A taste of Spring fills the Nebraska air as January draws to a close.  Perhaps the abnormally nice Winter weather is appropriate as I glance back at the first month of the new year.  My productivity level was almost the equivalent of bunnies boffing in the springtime bushes. 

Out with the old must have been my motto as I scrapped the nine chapters I completed of A STUDY IN ORANGE.  There was something wrong with the story, but I may have solved the problem.  In with the revised new must be my motto as I start over with Chapter One.  We shall see how this version goes.

In other news, I was about ready to close The FreakOptic Files when current events in Nebraska changed my mind.  One morning I was filming random scenes with an extremely vague idea in mind, figuring I would ultimately delete it all.  Then, upon reviewing the raw footage, the vague idea was forgotten and a new one solidified before my half-blind eyes.  DRONES OVER NEBRASKA! was born!  My love letter to communist paranoia flicks from the 1950's, with a nod to Ed Wood & David Lynch, garnered more views and responses than most of my FreakOptics videos.  I needed a win to keep me motivated and that goofy little video provided me with one.  (Watch it below, if you dare! 😉 ⤵️) 


Keeping up with the bunnies, I've blogged more than usual this month.  I'm pretty satisfied with the end results and hope to blog more about films, television, books and music in the months to come.  DON'T PANIC, I hopefully won't forget to blog about other random nonsense, such as the post you are currently  experiencing. 

On a personal note, I visited the local eye doc and my pools the color of dung continue to remain stable.  No change is a good thing. 

In conclusion, I need to keep these prolific creative bunnies in mind the next time I descend the emotional spiral staircase.  Yes, January 2020 has taught me that, even three years after the fact, I can still experience a meltdown in regard to my chunk of vision loss.  Can one ever fully recover from a traumatic event when one can see the results every single day?  A question for another time and post, perhaps. 


Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. An old post concerning a different type of bunnies...
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The Collective Eye for January was a short list...
...and this trend will continue in February.

Wednesday, January 22, 2020

freakboy on film: CHAINED FOR LIFE


(Side Note: IMDb lists this as a 2018 film, but also notes its release date as December 10, 2019)

A young blind woman finds herself in a hospital specializing in experimental surgery.  She falls in love with a disfigured man.  Is her love truly blind or will she reject him once her vision is restored?  Will such a rejection send him and the other patients on a murderous rampage right out of Tod Browning's Freaks? 

CUT! 

A young woman finds herself acting in an avant-garde horror film opposite a disfigured man.  Will they move past initial awkwardness to give the best performances they can?  Will they see beyond society's notions of beauty to forma common bond?

Writer-Director Aaron Schimberg brilliantly weaves these two juxtaposing plots together, leaving this viewer mesmerized.  A film within a film is nothing new, but Schimberg makes it feel fresh with compelling characters. 

(Side Note: I was transfixed by the look and style of the film within the film.  The scenes we are shown capture a late-1960's/early-1970's European cinematic vibe.)

Jess Weixler brings an effervescent sweetness mixed with a dash of Hollywood cynicism to Mabel.  Adam Pearson brings an innate gentleness mixed with a dash of charming wit to Rosenthal.  These two actors are the heart and soul of this funny, trippy and thought-provoking film.  

CHAINED FOR LIFE never preaches or talks down to the viewer.  Instead, this film subtly challenges the viewer to find humor in uncomfortable situations and to look at ourselves through different eyes. 

(Side Note: A scene where Mabel is being interviewed about portraying a blind woman gave this visually-impaired viewer a sly grin.  Her apparent unease discussing a disability she doesn't have was amusingly familiar territory to me.)

I stumbled upon CHAINED FOR LIFE in my library's DVD collection.  I had never heard of it, but the deceptively simple cover caught my half-blind eyes and drew me in.  I immediately knew I needed to experience this film.  As I checked out the DVD, the head librarian mentioned that she thought of me when she initially placed the film on the shelf.  I knew I crossed her mind because she knows I enjoy films with an indie sensibility and stories about outsiders.  However, there was a brief millisecond where my vanity wondered if she connected me to the film based on my physical appearance.  I quickly came to my senses, but this momentary superficial thought stuck with me as I watched the multi-layered characters and plot unfold, making the film resonate even more with me.

In conclusion, if you are in the mood for something wildly entertaining to take you outside of your comfort zone, look no further than CHAINED FOR LIFE. 



Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words.

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. A different film about outsiders...

Monday, January 20, 2020

Dance Your Cares Away (An Ode to Pansy Faye)



Oh Pansy 
Dear Pansy 
Here you are 
A shining star 
Making my world gay 

Oh Pansy 
Sweet Pansy 
Tell my fortune 
Sing a tune 
Dancing my cares away 

Oh Pansy 
Dead Pansy 
Time has gone 
Songs carry on 
Echoing through my day 



(This poem was inspired by the tragically short-lived character of Pansy Faye from DARK SHADOWS) 

Thank you for reading  or listening to my half-blind words. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. A different poem about a different TV series...

Tuesday, January 14, 2020

booking freakboy: KEEPING GLORIA SWANSON by Mark Albro


It is a strange time in Justin's life.  He is suffering from PTSD after witnessing two friends murdered in a terrorist attack.  His mother is dead, having seen her accidental decapitation.  His husband appears to be losing passion for their marriage.  A shifting in relationships seems to be seeping into his group of quirky, witty friends.  To top it all off, Justin is on the verge of turning 30. 

KEEPING GLORIA SWANSON strikes me as a stream of consciousness novel.  The story unfolds with various detours and tangents that ultimately give insight into Justin and those within his orbit.  Author Mark Albro fills the story with wit, style and pathos as we experience Justin careening towards his destiny in the scary, romantic, and sometimes superficial world around him.

In conclusion, if you are in the mood for a mixture of tragedy and humor, then KEEPING GLORIA SWANSON by Mark Albro may be the book for you!  

Available from...




Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind review. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. A different book from a different author...
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January's Collective 👁 is still open...