Showing posts with label bathroom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bathroom. Show all posts

Saturday, December 31, 2022

Flushing away 2022…

2022 hasn’t been complete crap, but there’s been plenty of it, both personally and worldwide.  So here is a New Year’s card I made for my sister (and others) at the end of 2003.   

A folded piece of paper with handwritten text that reads, A forget me.  Not!  Card. The initials JLH are in the bottom left corner.

Handwritten text reads, Margaret, Have an un-crappy new year!  John.  P.S. We can only hope.  Below the text is a cartoon of two women standing by a public restroom.  “What a stench,” remarks the curly blond haired woman.  “I can’t even open my eyes!” exclaims the smooth red haired woman.  A flushing sound emerges from the restroom and an underground pipe, connected to a water fountain, begins gurgling.   “I am so thirsty,” thinks a brown haired man as he approaches the fountain with water flowing out.  Meanwhile, am eavesdropping underground troll questions what is happening on the surface.

My sister and I unearthed this 19-year old relic during the process of moving this year and it seemed appropriate.  So, have an un-crappy New Year and thanks for visiting.  I think my blog has finally earned its name this year and hopefully I’ll continue to open up a bag of freak on all of you in 2023! 🤪


Freak Out, 

JLH 


P.S.  Click the pic ⤵️ for my most viewed tale of 2022…

A scene of two nice boys staring at the camera in Ed wood’s take it out in trade


Sunday, September 11, 2022

Confessional Toilets


Come unto this john, ye’ heathens, and confess!


Dump your sins before me and beg for forgiveness!


Shake off the remaining transgressions from your wretched soul! 


Flush your trespasses and then kneel to wash your hands for absolution! 


Purified, until you once again come unto this john, bloated with the odorous stench of unholy wickedness! 


A hallway with two bathrooms side by side with a cross on the far wall


(rinse & repeat)


~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words! 


Freak Out, 

JLH 


P.S. click the pic ⤵️ for more toilet humor… 


Two Tiny  bathrooms


…but DON’T click this other pic ⤵️ if Confessional Toilets offended you… 😉 


A close up of a bolt on wood


Friday, October 8, 2021

a photographic study of a tiny john (or the day I used a literal water closet)

I spent Thursday  the 7th with my friend and part-time muse Jody.  For something different, we traveled to a small town near my small town for a lunch and sight-seeing excursion.  Well, we experienced something very different at an eating establishment. 


A long view of two slender doors in a restaurant

A cow holding a plaque that reads… TURN SIDEWAYS. Suck It up. COME ON IN.

An over head view of a small bathroom.

A cow holding a plaque that reads… IF YOU SPRINKLE WHEN YOU TINKLE, BE A SWEETIE & WIPE THE SEATIE


The bright lighting in the little bathroom minimized the claustrophobic sensation.  It was definitely a unique experience and the Philly Cheese Steak Sandwich was delicious!  (Sorry, I didn’t snap a pic of it)


Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words and experiencing my toilet photography! 🚽 📸 


Freak Out, 

JLH 


P.S.  a different water closet post…

http://freakboyzone.blogspot.com/2016/08/the-water-closet-horror-parts-1-2.html

Wednesday, October 21, 2020

Front Seat Writer

 We now take you to a surprisingly good day...


My sister and I day-tripped to a nearby city to visit our oldest sister.  We had some time to kill, so we browsed around a few stores.  My sister purchased a sturdy and rather cool ice-scraper/snow brush.  I purchased a book for a friend and then became ridiculously excited by an apple-scented deodorant I've been wanting to try!  Don't even ask because I can't explain my unbridled joy over finally finding this personal hygiene product. 

While I was still floating in an apple-scented afterglow, we lunched with our oldest sister and her husband at Angus Burgers and Shakes. I told my sister she had to use the restroom before we left the restaurant because it's really cool.  Our oldest sister seemed to laugh at the idea but later agreed with me.  The sink's faucet is designed to resemble an old-time pump from a well.  The basin looks like it's lined with copper for that rustic ambiance.  I swear I need to start writing a coffee table book about cool and interesting public restrooms. 

Anyhoo, we picked up desserts and lunch for her youngest daughter and went back to our oldest sister's home.  My niece joined us at the dining room table and I asked about her online classes.  She is home from university thanks to COVID-19.  Even with this change of scene, she is studying many things, but we talked about two subjects near and dear to my freak heart...writing and filmmaking.

She told me all about a short film she wrote and directed. THE DOORWAY is about a door that randomly appears and one person is compelled to step through it.  There's humor, a sort-of love triangle and a dinosaur, so what else can you want?   I really enjoyed THE DOORWAY and there were creative elements that reminded me of me, just a little.  I will never tell my niece the latter because no 20 year-old wants to hear that from someone old.  However, she could actually be reading these words right now. 

Yes, I officially came out as a writer/blogger/indie author.  There wasn't a big , dramatic scene.  I just casually mentioned my books and this blog.  It felt right, but, of course, I downplayed my creative doings.  I didn't go to university to become a writer and I'm sure it shows. So, I have no idea what my niece will think of my work, if she explores my catalogue.  Hopefully she won't look upon my books & blogs with utter disdain.  Yet, a couple of previous posts here may be offensive/shocking and don't get me started on my books, especially DARK EXCURSIONS.

Oh well, at least my creative side isn't a dirty little secret anymore.  It feels good to free that side of myself and probably nothing will overly change because of it.  I'll continue to write and blog, always striving to capture my authentic freaky self and the rest of my family will continue to do what they do.

In conclusion, it is a remarkable sensation to discover a kindred creative spirit within my immediate family.  I believe my niece was surprised to learn that her generally quiet uncle has worlds within him.  I'm not even sure how much time passed but our conversation was more enjoyable than apple-scented deodorant.

I sincerely wish my niece success in her creative endeavors, while hopefully staying true to her voice and vision.  If you have 14 minutes to spare, please step through THE DOORWAY...


Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words.

SIDE NOTE: I didn't write this post while riding in the front seat, but it started to take shape as my sister and I traveled home.

Freak Out,
JLH

P.S.  When I was a backseat writer....