4 things I don’t totally hate from 2023…

I’ve been going through the “everything I write is 💩” phase again.  This feeling comes and goes and will hopefully pass soon.  Until then, here are 4 things I don’t totally hate from 2023…

(You know the drill…click the pics ⤵️ to read, watch or whatever…)

1…  I released STURGEONS  (the complete serials) and now there are over 50 copies in the hands of readers around the world.  

(Photo courtesy of The Dobson Family Archive)

2…. I was inspired to write a poem by a freaky doll in the window of a local auction house and I still dig its dark humor. 

(Photo courtesy of The Demonic Auction House)

3…. I purchased a new pair of shoes and ended up creating a video which has been called my best. 

(Poster courtesy of The FreakOptic Files)

4…. I was interviewed by a local newspaper reporter about my books and chunk of vision loss.  I still appreciate that the article appeared on the page opposite the obituaries. 

(Article courtesy of Custer County Chief)

Thank you for your support of my creative endeavors in 2023 and I will half-see you in 2024.

I don’t totally hate this selfie

Freak Out, 
JLH 

 P.S.  One more thing from 2023… I experienced the script to what could be my favorite Andy Milligan film if a print is ever found. 

freakboy on film: SURGIKILL (1989)

It has been way too long since I blogged about Andy Milligan, so I conducted a poll on the site formerly known as Twitter.  Out of the four films listed in the poll, SURGIKILL won.  So, here we are for the last of Milligan’s California excursions.  

Directed by Andy Milligan/Screenplay by Andy Milligan/Story by Sherman Hirsh/Uncredited writing credit: Sid Caplin 

Overseen by Dr. Grace Goode, the Goode Community Hospital was established to help the patients who typically can’t afford medical care.  Well this is a case of getting what you pay for.  The hospital staff is incompetent at best, psychotic at worst, so it isn’t long before patients start dropping off like flies at the hands of a serial killer.  Dr. Goode keeps encouraging everyone to carry on as if nothing is wrong, even when the staff also begin turning up dead.  To top it all off, the hospital is going bankrupt and may be forced to close its doors forever.  

Young doctors in love

What will happen?  Will Dr. Goode find emotional support from Nurse Ratchitt and physical support from Dr. Harvey Harvey?  Will the serial killer be caught before disposing of the entire cast?  Will the hospital close, hopefully also closing the possibility of a sequel?  Well, I can’t force you to suffer through SURGIKILL just to find out. 

Never fear, Nurse Ratchitt is here!

SPOILER ALERT… 
The serial killer is Nurse Ratchitt, who is really Dr. Goode’s cousin in drag.  He wants to discredit Dr. Goode and take over the hospital, but he fails.  After all of that, the surviving staff actually manages to help a patient who has a rich twin brother, so the Goode Community Hospital will keep its doors open.  Yay, I guess. 

Like a Surgeon

I never thought I’d say this, but thankfully Andy Milligan died before he could make another film, sequel or otherwise.  SURGIKILL became the abysmal finale in a career that started off with such a promise of possibilities in VAPORS, reached its zenith with FLESHPOT ON 42ND STREET and then went downhill from there.  Though I think WEIRDO: THE BEGINNING is extremely watchable and is easily his best California excursion.  

The writing in SURGIKILL is a sub-juvenile trip through stale one-liners and sex jokes, with soap opera parody elements which I almost appreciate.  From what I’ve read, some think Andy actually had nothing to do with the script, but my gut says he did.  There are too many Milligan moments, including a line ripped right out of FLESHPOT, even if these moments lack the punch of his East Coast and British films.  Andy’s directing is also severely lacking.  With the exception of a disturbing close-up of a killer’s face while suffocating a patient with a pillow, Milligan seems to have just set up the camera and called, “Action!” without directing the actors.  

He is doomed!

What can I say about the “acting” in SURGIKILL?  Is it bad acting when there barely seems to be any acting at all?  Most of the actors seem to be winging it in every scene, especially the buffoonish orderlies.  I suppose the “thespian” credited as “Bouvier” has a weirdly interesting screen presence as Dr. Grace Goode.  The only other worthy mention is Dan Foster-Jones as Nurse Ratchitt, who gets all the best lines, especially when she is being harassed by an obscene phone caller.  His performance in female nurse drag bares more than a passing similarity to the character of Cherry Lane in FLESHPOT, though Dan Foster-Jones can’t compare with the brilliance of Neil Flanagan! 

In conclusion…
SURGIKILL is a painfully awful mess of a movie that should only be viewed by maladjusted Andy Milligan completists like me.  However, in hindsight, Milligan may have finally succeeded in creating a true cinematic torture dungeon.  In other words, admit yourself to this hospital at your own risk and beg for anesthesia! 

‘Nuff said?

Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S.  This was only my third viewing of SURGIKILL and I realized the screaming of an elderly wheelchair-bound woman as she is pushed down a flight of stairs was dubbed from Maggie Rogers as Mrs. Manning in SEEDS (aka Seeds of Sin).  Was it a loving tribute or just a cheap way to get a good scream?  You decide. 

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My books on Amazon… viewAuthor.at/JohnLHarmon 

Killer Nature (a poem, of sorts)

Take my hand 
As we stroll 
Through the flowering fields
Until our feet meet with thorns
Infection quickly spreads 
Losing the need for shoehorns 

Take my hand 
As we hobble 
Through the wandering woods 
Until a full hugging tree 
Slaps our smiling faces   
Leaving us with nothing to see  

Take my hand 
As we feel 
Through the silent shrubbery   
Until aromas make us crave 
Sweet berry poison  
Leading us to nature’s grave 

____________
2023, John L. Harmon 

I asked a friend for a poetry topic and she suggested nature.  The above words were the result. 🌳🪦

Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. click the pic ⤵️ for a different poem inspired by a different friend… 

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My books on Amazon… viewAuthor.at/JohnLHarmon 

freakboy on film: PARANOIAC (The 4th Hammer-Amicus Blogathon Edition)

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This post is part of the 4th Hammer-Amicus Blogathon, hosted by Barry of Cinematic Catharsis & Gill of Realweegiemidget Reviews! 

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In Hammer-Amicus Blogathons past, I’ve sunk my teeth into supernatural horror, geeked out over sci-fi zaniness and danced to the beat of teen jazz obsession.  This time around finds me lurking in the shadows of a 1963 psychological thriller that I had never seen before!  Honestly, I didn’t know much about PARANOIAC other than the soap opera twist its plot is centered around. 

Poor Eleanor and Simon Ashby.  First they lost their parents in a terrible accident.  Then their brother Tony killed himself.  These tragedies continue to hang heavy over the Ashby family mansion.  Maybe this is why Eleanor believes she has seen Tony alive!  Simon and Aunt Harriet believe Eleanor has taken leave of her senses…or has she? 

Pushed to the emotional brink, Eleanor has decided to emulate her brother’s suicide by jumping off a cliff into the ocean.  A man saves her and takes her home, shocking everyone in the household.  Apparently, this man is Tony!  No body was ever found, so could it actually be the presumed dead Ashby sibling?  

Tensions mount as the family tries to figure out if this man is really Tony.  Aunt Harriet becomes even more intense.  Simon drinks and explodes in fury even more often than before.  Eleanor believes the man is her brother, but is disturbed by her growing attraction to him. 

Is Tony really Tony?  How will Eleanor handle her incestuous feelings?  Will Simon finally snap?  Can Aunt Harriet keep things under control?  Also, what is up with the creepy singing and organ music coming from the dilapidated chapel?  Who is lurking down there in the nightmare fuel of a mask and what does it mean?  Secrets are revealed, sometimes sooner than expected, but my lips are sealed!  You’ll have to watch PARANOIAC to find the answers! 

After spending a day fighting Triffids, Janette Scott as Eleanor Ashby gives a good performance as a woman on the verge of a nervous breakdown.  Sheila Burrell as Aunt Harriet gives a strong performance as the ersatz matriarch trying to keep family secrets a secret.  Alexander Davion as Tony Ashby gives an intriguing performance as the man who may or may not be who he seems.  (SIDE NOTE: Davion went on to play Ted Casablanca in VALLEY OF THE DOLLS (1967).  Then there is the always memorable Oliver Reed as Simon Ashby.  Reed comes on like gangbusters as the drunkenly violent member of the Ashby clan.  According to the audio commentary, this may have been art imitating life.  

Screenwriter Jimmy Sangster weaves an emotionally disturbing story with echoes of gothic horror reverberating through the corridors.  The viewer may see some of the twists and turns coming, but maybe not when they will occur, which keeps the plot on edge.  After one early revelation, I told my sister I thought it would be the big finale reveal, not something given away halfway through the film.

Director Freddie Francis draws out a solid Hammer film from the script and actors.  He keeps the camera moving, the pace brisk and the atmosphere tense.  A scene involving a car dangling precariously off a cliff is particularly effective! 

If I have one complaint, it is my disappointment in how little the super freaky-creepy mask is utilized in the plot.  When the blu-ray arrived, I was startled by this grotesque face staring back from the cover.  (No, not Oliver Reed)  I let my imagination run rampant with visions of a masked killer bumping off members of a wealthy family.  Maybe the resurrected Hammer studio will give this psychological thriller a contemporary slasher twist! 

In conclusion… 
Somehow PARANOIAC is not quite what you think of with Hammer films, but also totally a Hammer production.  The cinematography is lush black & white.  The performances are spot on for the story.  If you enjoy turbulent twists and turns within a mansion of deep, dark secrets, then you will be captivated by PARANOIAC!  I know I was! 

Thank you for reading or listening to my half-blind words. 

Freak Out, 
JLH 

P.S. click the pic ⤵️ for a different review involving a super freaky-creepy mask…

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Something strange is happening in the town of STURGEONS… 

                      (available from an Amazon near you)